“You’re the biggest goddamn hypocrite I’ve ever met. You won’t even consider giving me what I want when we both know you like it when I’m in charge. You like it when you slap me. You like the dark and kinky shit I’m into. So don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.”
“I’m not into—”
“Then you stick your nose in my family life when you have no right to do that. You won’t even give me the courtesy of telling me who you really are, but you’re just gonna storm into Ruin and talk to Jackson about my mom?”
My mouth opened to argue back, but I shut it again when I heard what he said. I didn’t tell him who I really was? What did that mean? Did he know about my past? Or was he just making a general statement, and it was purely coincidence. I didn’t see how it was possible that he could truly know anything about my abnormal past, so I assumed it was the latter.
Despite my rage, I understood why he was so upset. In the end, I knew I was the one at fault. I took a breath to calm myself and defuse the situation. We were alone on the corner, but within a second, a random person could pass by and watch our ridiculous fight. “You told me you would walk away from that life. I never asked you to, Calloway. So are you having doubts?”
He continued to give me a furious expression, his blue eyes resembling atomic bombs. He worked his jaw like his teeth were grinding together painfully.
His silence frightened me. “Calloway?” I felt my heart drop down into my stomach. I loved what we had, and I would be devastated if he wasn’t happy. We’d grown so close to one another. It didn’t even bother me that he didn’t tell me he loved me since it was obvious every time he looked at me. “Calloway?”
He finally answered, his jaw still tense. “I’ve never doubted that I want to be with you—and only you.”
A part of me wanted to read between the lines of his response, because he didn’t truly answer the question. But a bigger part of me wanted to accept what he said instead of overanalyzing it. “What did you mean when you said I butt into your family’s life but you don’t really know who I am?”
He looked down the street like he may have been waiting for Tom to circle back and retrieve us. He was still tense with anger, his limbs shaking slightly because he was still so livid. Calloway was always intense, but this was a new level for him. “Nothing.”
“Nothing?”
“You still have your walls up.”
“I don’t have any walls with you, Calloway.” I’d allowed this man to become permanent. I relied on him for things I’d never relied on anyone for. I trusted him—loved him.
“There’s more to your past that you aren’t telling me about.”
Was it a speculation or an accusation? I wanted to deflect the question altogether. “I don’t see why my past matters. My life with you started the day I met you. Everything before that is irrelevant.”
“You didn’t tell me about Hank, and that mattered,” he snapped.
The insult struck me like a palm to the face. “I thought I could handle it on my own—”
“And you couldn’t. I could have removed that piece of shit a lot sooner.”
I didn’t like talking to Calloway like this. He was fearsome and irrational. He wasn’t the man I knew, the one I’d fallen in love with. He was a beast that lost his temper. He could have yanked the stop sign out of the cement, and I wouldn’t have been surprised. “I’m sorry about what I said. I was just upset and got carried away.” An apology was always a good way to get the other person to calm down.
Judging by the cold way he stared at me, that wasn’t enough.
“I was just trying to help with Jackson. But if you don’t want me to talk to him, I won’t. I just thought an outside perspective could change his mind. I admit Jackson is unreasonable sometimes, but if he’s anything like you, I know he has a heart somewhere inside there.”
“I’ve never seen it.”
He was speaking out of anger, so I ignored it.
Tom pulled up to the curb in the black sedan, the windows tinted. He continued to stare forward so as to give us some form of privacy.
Calloway glanced at the car before he looked at me again.
I stepped closer to him and watched his body remain rigid. He usually softened when I came near, his arms automatically circling my waist and pulling me to his chest. I stopped in front of him and looked up at his fierce expression.
He didn’t touch me.