I pushed their faces out of my head. If I thought too long about them, I would go back to when I killed them, grabbing Akiva’s letter opener off the desk, and stabbing the first one in the center of his throat, and then the other, and the other. So old and shocked, they hadn’t even run. Just stood there and took it.
Ava disrupted my thoughts. “Do you want to take a shower?”
“Yes.” I was at her service. I would do anything she wanted. I would get on my knees and beg for forgiveness, if I had to.
No backlash better come her way, or all will die. Even if she tells me goodbye, I would wait in the shadows and crush any of her enemies.
Exhaling, she began to take off her leotard.
We’re taking the shower together? That must be a good sign. Are we taking it together?
She pulled it down, exposing a sports bra underneath. When the leotard got to her hips, she looked back at me. “You. . .you don’t have to shower with me, if you don’t want. You can. . .” she cleared her throat. “You can do whatever you want.”
Stunned, I hurried and unbuttoned my shirt. Of course I would shower with her. I yearned to feel her body next to mine.
In the limo, I wanted to hold her, but she looked too scared. Freaked out by the situation and terrified of me. What else could I do but give her space?
In the bedroom’s silence, we undressed. When she finished, she walked into the bathroom.
I unbuckled my pants, took them off, and then removed my shoes.
The shower sounded.
Next, I slipped off my briefs.
How crazy that earlier today, we’d taken a shower and it had all been fine. Now I would walk into that bathroom, completely exposed. More naked than I have ever been.
I gulped down my fear and headed in.
She didn’t turn on the light. A little sunshine peeked in from the window blinds. Mostly, shadows danced around the bathroom.
I entered the shower.
Water streamed down Ava’s curvy body. She had her back to me. Her hair was already wet. Those hands still shook as she ran her fingers through those soaked strands. The delicious and unique fragrance of her lavender shampoo mixed with the feminine scent of her skin.
I craved her touch. Unable to help myself, I came up behind her and gently placed my hands on her hips.
She jumped a little.
I moved them away.
She turned around and stared at me. “I’m sorry.”
“No. I’m sorry.”
Why were we apologizing to each other?
She bit her lip and widened her eyes. “Why are you sorry?”
“I scared you. . .and. . .the men—”
“Let’s not talk about that right now. I’m trying to forget.”
“Forgetting is good.”
“Is it?”
“Yes.” I reached my hands out again, opening my arms to her.
Thankfully, she stepped into my hold, leaning her head against my chest. Her body trembled, but she was close to me.
She’s not running. . .at least not yet.
“They were monsters,” she whispered.
“They were.”
“So. . .maybe, it’s okay.”
“It is.”
Steam rose around us.
She leaned away and raised her head, searing me with her view. “But. . .”
“Ask me anything, Ava. I’m scared. If you need questions answered, then ask away.”
“You’re scared?”
“I don’t want to lose you.”
She returned to leaning her head on my chest. “I’m scared too.”
I didn’t want to say the words, but I made myself. “Are you scared of me?”
The response was a soft whisper. “Yes.”
She trembled but didn’t leave my arms.
I held her small body tighter. “I will not hurt you. I will only protect you. That is all. Nothing would come your way.”
“What about O? She was murdered near your house.”
I gritted my teeth. “That had nothing to do with me. It involved Valentina.”
She sighed. “Valentina did it? Are you sure?”
“Certain.”
“How do you know?”
“She confessed it to someone, and he told me.”
“You had nothing to do with Valentina killing O?”
“Nothing at all.” I pulled her away a little, touched her chin, and lifted her view to me. “If I had any idea that Valentina was going to do that, I would have stopped her. I swear to you. The last thing I wanted was any hurt to come your way.”
“What’s going to happen to you now, Misha?”
“What do you mean?”
“The men you killed. They’re heavily—”
“Trust me. I can handle it.”
“Because. . .because you’re part of the Bratva?”
Goddman it.
I pulled her back into my arms.
Warm water sprayed on both of us, but more on Ava’s back then me.
“Misha?”
“I’m not completely connected to them, but my cousin is the head of it. No one would act against me, unless they were ready to deal with his wrath. And no one, not anyone wants that.”
She let out a long breath. “So, then you’re protected?”
She’s worried about me?
I took that as another good sign.
“Yes, Ava. I am protected.” I grabbed some of her body wash and put a little on her. For several silent seconds, she let me cover her in suds. After a while, she moved away, grabbed a cloth, took the bodywash, and began cleaning me too.