‘Are you serious?’ I whisper, looking up at him in shock.
‘I’ve never been more serious,’ he replies solemnly. He reaches into his pocket and takes out a small velvet box. My heart is racing so fast that I’m scared it will jump out of my throat and drown in the sea. I stare at him wordlessly as he opens it up to reveal a striking diamond ring.
I look at the man in front of me, usually so confident and self-assured but right now so nervous and afraid. I look at the lengths he’s gone to, to build up to this moment: flying out here, this spectacular setting, the magnificent ring. I think about his warm, loving, stable family and how they welcomed me into their home and their lives. I remember his reaction when I told him about Tariq and how supportive and protective he’s been of me since. I remember how good-natured he was when I cross-examined him, and how perfect his answers were. I remember how he found it in his heart to forgive me after Mo showed up at the event. Adam crosses my mind too .?.?. and how he not only disappeared after our kiss, but he shagged my friend and colleague two days later. Then I think of my mum and how desperate she is for me to get married .?.?. And lastly Samia, who is about to marry a guy who thought I wasn’t good enough.
But as I stand here with this man who is madly in love with me, and who I’m beginning to fall for, I have an epiphany.
I’m not desperate. My mum might be, but I’m not. If I was desperate, I would have run off with the first man who came my way, but I didn’t. If I was desperate, I would have said yes to Hamza long ago. I don’t need a man to complete me. My life’s already complete – with my big fat family, my friends, my job. A man would complement it, not complete it.
I’ve taken my time to get to this point because I’ve been waiting for the right man, the right moment, and now I know, with all my heart, that the right time is now.
‘Yes,’ I whisper, my eyes brimming with tears. ‘Yes, I will.’