“I was sixteen and pregnant with that monsters child and you didn’t belive me when I said he abused me,” I say, speaking the words I’ve only said less than a handful of times. “He told his lies and the one person I thought would save me was you, but you shunned me and you think I could just get over that?”
“Summer, I still have a hard time believing Ted could do that to you,” he says that and my heart breaks all over again. He still doesn’t believe me.
After all this time, he thinks badly of me.
My God.
“Regardless, I have tried so hard with you over the years to reach out to you. I’ve met you more than half way but you wouldn’t give me a chance, Summer.”
It seems as if he’s forgotten what really happened. “Dad if you can sit there and tell me you still don’t believe what Ted did to me then we still have a problem.”
“Summer we do still have a problem, and it’s the same problem that’s brought on this situation. The problem is you.”
His words deliver a punch to my gut and syphon all the air from my body.
It’s happening again. He’s blaming me.
“You are too reckless,” he adds. “You have this careless personality that stops you from thinking before you act. Scarlett’s death is because of your recklessness.
You have no idea what I went through watching that video of what happened, watching that man shoot her. He shot your sister and killed her because he thought she was you.”
“I …” I rasp out, feeling like I just want to die.
“There’s nothing you can say Summer,” he continues. “Your mother’s death might not have been your fault, but this is. Your sister should be able to visit you without the threat of her life. But your recklessness pushed you toward those men. Summer, you worked in a sex club owned and run by the most dangerous men you can think of. What did you think was going to happen?”
My soul shatters and all I have strength to do is get up.
I can’t do this.
I can’t be around him anymore
“Where are you going Summer?”
Instead of answering, I walk away. Walk back the way I came.
Tears blind my vision as I hurry through the door and see Eric standing by the car smoking a cigar.
I stop for a moment on the steps and bring my hands up to my cheeks as the tears come. Not tears like last night. That was just an overflow that needed to pour to take the edge off. What I cry now is real tears.
Eric puts out the cigar when he sees the state I’m in, and places it back in the car.
I don’t know what comes over me, but when I look at him again I find myself running to him.
When I reach him, I grab onto his shirt as if I need to hold on to the fabric to keep myself from fading away.
“Summer, baby, are you okay?” he asks, but his voice sounds so far away.
I open my mouth to answer but I can’t. Everything Dad said swirls around in my mind and grief assails me.
That’s when I break again. That’s the moment when reality truly hits and guilt for my recklessness consumes me. The tears flow from my eyes like a river, the pain in my soul never ending. Like I won’t be able to stop it and it will kill me if I allow it. But this is the first time that I don’t feel like fighting.
Just as that thought hits me, I feel strong arms encircling me with warmth.
Eric pulls me into the safety of him, against the hard walls of his chest and keeps me from crumbling. The rapid beat of his heart reminds me of the protection he offers me. Right now I might not be running for my life, but the warmth of his embrace protects me from the gamut of emotions attacking me.
“Summer,” he whispers against my ear.
“Please can we go? Can we go home?”
“Of course. Let’s go home.”