“Give me an example.”
“The fucking funeral home. Isn’t that something we should’ve discussed before you sprung it on me at the table? Z knew before I did. And he’s not even your VP anymore.”
His words hit me like the high beams of a car racing along a dark, country road. And I’m the dumbass standing in the middle of the highway squinting into the glare. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
The apology seems to take the wind from his anger. “Huh. Didn’t expect you to actually apologize.”
“I don’t do it often.”
“No shit,” he mutters.
“What else?” We’re making progress. I think.
“I don’t know.” He drops his gaze. “You’ve always been hard on us. But it’s just been different. I thought it was the new role I took on…but now…”
“That’s probably part of it. Don’t forget, it took Z and me a long time to work out a balance.”
He seems to consider that. “You’re sure you trust me?”
“To represent the club? To have my back? Yes, without question.” I run my hand over the back of my neck. “It’s not your abilities I’m questioning.”
“Whose are you questioning?” He snorts. “Yours?”
“Well, I fucked this up.”
“Now I see it,” he says slowly.
“What’s that?”
He waves his hands at me. “That martyr bullshit Wrath’s always saying you pull. I get it now.”
“You realize I’m responsible for all of you? If I don’t question myself from time to time, I’ve got no business at the head of that table.”
“I know,” he says quietly. After a few beats of silence, he squints at me. “Was it weird?”
“What?”
“Well, you’ve caught him in some…embarrassing positions and vice versa over the years. Finding out he’s your son after the shit you’ve seen…” He lets out a long, low whistle.
I snort, then full-on laugh. “Yeah, fucker. It shed a whole new light on the last few decades. Your buddy also accused me of child abuse for all those times I choked his disrespectful ass.”
He bursts out laughing. “What a baby.”
“Besides the weirdness, I felt guilty I didn’t know.” I clasp my hands behind my neck and stare at the sky for a moment. “I wasn’t there for him the way a father should have been. All the stupid shit and fucking around I did, seems so ridiculous when I had a son who needed me.”
“Weren’t you a kid yourself?” He frowns. “Besides, you were there for him…for both of us.”
“Not out of the kindness of my heart,” I admit, tired of them acting like I had altruistic reasons for looking after them when they were kids. “You realize that, don’t you? I knew you’d be good for the club and wanted to eventually recruit you.”
He shrugs. “So? I had a crackhead for a mother, Rock. You imposed some order in my otherwise chaotic life. Made me finish school. Helped me earn money to support myself. Stop trying to turn your good deeds into something ugly.”
Fuck me. “You spend too much time around Wrath.”
One corner of his mouth lifts. “Who knew we’d end up so tight? Always thought he hated my ass.”
“Nah, it takes him a few decades to warm up to people.” We stare at each other for a few beats. “Are we good?”
“You tell me.” Caution colors his words.