"I need to go to the office, are you going to behave?" Dimitri’s demanding tone should have irked me.
"I'm going to take a bath and convene with my cards." I shrugged as I spoke, but Dimitri trained his gaze on me for a moment longer than necessary, as if he were weighing the truth of my statement.
Finally, he released me from his gaze, turning away to leave me alone once more.
Pins and needles sparked along my fingertips as I feathered the edge of my cards. I knew I needed to do a reading for myself, but for the first time I was terrified of what the cards would tell - of how they would impact my decision.
I decided to soak in Dimitri's tub rather than my own - it was bigger and it had a neat wooden tray that sat across the tub. Something I imagined using while I read one of my books in the tub. But today I had an entirely different idea.
The water bubbled and steamed as I dropped a thick layer of salt at the bottom of the tub. I needed a bath that would help me with clarity of mind, but my late nights with Dimitri were also catching up to me, so I needed the bath to be restorative as well.
I watched the clear quartz stone sink beneath the water, as if she was welcoming an old friend home. The water swirled in anticipation to see what I would add in next. The sound of the cork popping off the glass vile echoed through Dimitri’s bathroom, and where my en-suite was all whites with hues of pinks and peaches, Dimitri’s bathroom had an almost clinical feel to it, with it’s dark ombre tiles against the white backdrop. The vile was from Zoey’s stash that she made each of us regularly, and even though the herbs had long since been dried and crushed, the smell of lavender scented the air.
My fingertips skated across the water, dipping in and out of its warmth. I swirled the mixture with my hand, tracing sigils into the surface before I stepped into the bath entirely.
It was a homecoming of sorts, with the water parting for me, its heat bit at my ankles like a familiar excited to see the person they were beholden to. Before I sank into her warmth, I was careful to lay out my blue silken scarf with my cards onto the wooden bath tray that hung across the bath.
My head settled against the back of the tub as I stretched out beneath the water, the warmth encasing me as if it were a blanket, seeking out every crevice I had so that she could slide in and fill me with her warmth. There was a slight indentation within the back of Dimitri’s tub specifically for the purpose of resting one’s head, and I decided there and then that I preferred Dimitri’s tub over mine.
I shut my eyes and allowed the events of the day - the weeks really - to wash over me. Dimitri had pretty much told my mother that I was moving in - had moved in. But I knew Emily Rand - knew that now that he had given her some sort of sliver of what she deemed to be hope, she would pester him.
When would we be looking to get married? Did he want children? How many children did he want? What kind of wedding were we looking for?
We would be lucky to get through this dinner unscathed. I wasn’t certain what Dimitri’s answers would be - wasn’t even certain of my own emotions really, and therein lay yet another problem.
My exhale did nothing to move the steam rising near my face away as I pushed up from the tub into a sitting position. I needed to consult with my cards - needed to connect with what was going in my life - assert myself into my own goddamn story as an active protagonist, somehow, instead of simply being a participant.
I opened the silk wrap and allowed the air around me to brush against my deck. I knew the steam from the bath wasn’t great for my cards, but I also needed this - desperately. I needed to feel the connection of water and reconnect with my cards.
I allowed the hum of that connection to thrum through my fingertips into the cards, and in return I felt the cards send the connection back to me, shivering as it reverberated through my body.
I sat in the tub, shuffling and reshuffling my cards, allowing my questions and concerns to fill my mind, until only one question stood out, demanding answers and solutions.
Was Dimitri serious about me? Could this work? What did I have to do to make this work? Did I want to make this work?
Shit. Too many questions. I exhaled deeply before plucking only one question from my mind.
What could be expected when it came to Dimitri and I?
My fingers slid a card from my deck, and when I flipped it over, I could do nothing but stare - stare and process, and understand.
The image of Death stared back at me. Upright.
Death normally indicated an ending - a finality of something, but that finality could also be viewed as transformational - a transition of some sort.
But what? I couldn’t tell if it meant that Dimitri and I were doomed to fail, or if our relationship was evolving somehow, and my guides were silent.
We couldn’t be doomed to fail - not when Isis herself had all but blessed the relationship.
My fingers grazed my deck once more as I pulled out another card, seeking answers to what the transformation would be - what I should prepare myself for.
The King of Coins glared back at me - Dimitri’s card.
It was traditionally The King of Pentacles, but my deck highlighted it for what it was - Dimitri was a man of power and influence. He led the Bratva, and while he wasn’t a king in the traditional sense, I would argue that few others could meet his title and rank, and in the spirit of truth, wasn’t that what a king was?
I pulled a third card, struck by what I saw.
The Emperor. Upright.