She harrumphed.
“Not surprised. Sounds like you’ve been getting up to all sorts of energy-expending… endeavors since you got here.”
“If you only knew.”
“I wanna know! I’m all ears. And quivering thighs.”
“Gird your loins. We’ll talk more about it later.”
“Just tell me that part. Come on… You can’t open that can and not spill the beans.”
I leaned in close.
“It grew while it was… you know… in me.”
“His… penis?”
“Yup. The knot thing Ivy mentioned. And it started doing this pulsating thing. Like a vibrator but with the dial turned up to like… six hundred.”
Mom’s eyes bulged.
“I want my own wolf shifter,” she stated.
I rolled my eyes.
“I’m deadly serious,” she declared.
“Let’s go to sleep,” I then said, not wanting her to start firing more questions at me.
“Fine. But guess what I’ll be dreaming of? Neck clits and pulsating… dickie birds.”
Her body shook with laughter.
“Eesh. Do not tell me you’re about to have sex dreams when you’re sleeping right here beside me.”
Dickie bird? Bleck. That’s what my little brother called his… thing… And my reaction to that nickname would make Mom use it as a weapon to get me laughing. We would giggle every time he said it, Ivy and me. And I know that’s why she said it then, wanting to inject some levity.
***
It’s been a half hour since we stopped talking, since we got under the covers, but obviously we’ve both been lying here thinking. I can sense her thought-bubble overhead, next to mine.
“I think Ivy’s gonna be fine,” she breaks the silence.
“Hope so,” I whisper.
Physically and emotionally. Because I don’t know the extent of what my sister has been through, but I do know it was deep heartache I saw in her eyes the other day.
Mom caresses my cheek and then kisses my forehead.
“I think you both are.”
“I just wanna sleep and then once we know Ivy’s all right, get to the bottom of this fortune teller shit and get this spell reversed.”
“But this could be the best thing that happens to you. This could be the beginning of your happily-ever-after, my baby girl. You don’t throw a winning lottery ticket in the trash…”
I say nothing to that. I just snuggle into my mom. But my chin wobbles.
She whispers, “I can’t wait to get my happy ending, sweetie. I know I shouldn’t need a man to be happy, but damn it, I want one. I want a good one who won’t let me down.”
“Nothing wrong with wanting that, Mom. You deserve to have what you want, ” I say.
And she really does. It’s awful what my father, her husband did to her after twenty-seven years of marriage and three children.
Dad was a good dad when we were kids, I have great memories from my early childhood. But when my brother hit his teens, it was like Dad just checked out of the marriage. As if because his kids didn’t need him as much anymore, he didn’t need his wife. And that’s really shitty – my parents should’ve had time to focus on one another after all the self-sacrifices until the time came when they had grandbabies to spoil. But Dad decided to spoil himself instead by having an affair, leaving Mom when she finds out the truth, then trying to worm his way back home after his girlfriend dumps him.
And a kid knows when they’re the least favorite. Dad was over-the-moon when he had a son. And he always treats Ivy like a princess. But me? He’s never hidden the fact that I’m a pain in his ass. I’m proud of her for sticking to her guns. Very proud.
But right now, I’m staring off into space, feeling sad. Because I can’t accept all this as my own happy ending if it’s fake. I love my mom, I respect her, but I watched her heart get stomped on after she put everything she had into her marriage. That won’t happen to me. And this whole fake thing might have a time limit. What happens if the magic wears off and these shifters realize they’re with the wrong women?
The idea of my sister being heartbroken strikes deep pain in me. I can’t let myself get caught up in this.
I’ve always wanted something real. Deep. Three-dimensional. Unfailingly loyal. And I don’t think I’ve ever had anything like that.
I was resolved with Rick that what we had was pragmatic. It was logical. Practical. Especially after everything that went wrong with Blake. After everything that happened with Mom and Dad. I wanted to protect myself from that kind of heartache and it felt like things with Rick made sense.
And now… now I want so much more than that. And wanting it feels dangerous.
***
I wake up to tingling. Very pleasant tingling. It starts on my arm and slowly moves up to my throat. To Mason’s claiming mark.
I open my eyes, getting a lungful of Mason. His scent is everywhere. In my lungs. In my head. He’s left a trail of heat and zinging nerve endings. And I’ve gone from sound asleep to awake and horny.