"You ruined me the minute I met you, little owl," I murmur, using my thumbs to brush away her tears. I have to remove her glasses and set them on the nightstand when they get in the way. "I started falling before you even crashed into me and I haven't stopped yet. I'm constantly thinking about you, dreaming about you, obsessing over you."
"Sebastian," she says as more tears spill down her cheeks. I catch those too, wiping them away, touching her because anything else is impossible. She's mine, a part of me.
"It's true, pretty Paradise," I murmur, dipping my head to kiss away the tears still shimmering in her lashes. "You could never ruin my life when you're the reason I finally know what it means to be whole. All my life, I've waited for you. I love you, Rowan. Nothing Richard Johnson could ever say or do would change that."
"You l-love me?" She blinks at me, her expression changing rapidly from sorrow to confusion and then to hope. It blooms in the depths of her eyes, seeds sprouting in rich, earthy brown.
"How could I not love you, Paradise?" I ask, shaking my head at her, a gentle smile playing on my lips. That she doesn't know how infinitely lovable she is baffles me. "Carl Sagan said we're made of star stuff, but not you, little owl. You're made of the oldest magic there is. You are love, shining so fucking brightly you make everything around you shine too. Of course I love you. So damn much that just the thought of losing you rips my fucking heart out."
"I love you too," she whispers, sniffling. "You're my favorite everything. T-that's why you have to break up w-with me. I t-tried to be brave enough to d-do it, but I it hurts s-so much. I c-can't b-be the r-reason they f-fire you. Everyone will say bad t-things about you b-because of me. They'll fire you."
"Is that what he told you?"
She bobs her head in a miserable nod, her bottom lip quivering again.
"Some people may think badly of me," I murmur, not lying to her. She's too smart to believe a lie, and I respect her too much to tell her one. "They may even say bad things about me. I don't give a fuck. I like what I do. If I quit tomorrow, I'd miss it."
"T-that's why we c-can't be together. I w-won't let them t-take that from you."
"If I quit tomorrow, I'd miss it," I repeat. "But if I lost you, it'd kill me. I've spent my whole fucking life waiting for you, Paradise. I'd give up everything to keep you." I place my finger over her lips when she opens her mouth to respond. "But that isn't going to happen. I didn't agree to be discreet to keep people from finding out about us. I've been honest with the board from the beginning. I agreed to keep it discreet because I worried Johnson might try something like this."
"You did?"
I nod. "He's a troll, exactly like you said. He takes pleasure in making others miserable because he's a miserable son of a bitch. Commodore is all he has. He's so hyper-focused on making it the best school in the state, he sees any little ripple as a threat to his goal. But he forgot something important."
She blinks watery eyes at me, waiting for me to tell her what he forgot. I take a second to readjust my position, laying beside her with my head propped on one arm. The other I throw over her abdomen, rolling her onto her side to face me. I tangle our legs together, wanting us touching in as many places as possible. I'm addicted to the feel of her soft body against me.
"He forgot that numbers and data aren't what make a school great. The people who work there and the students who go there make the school great," I murmur, tucking her hair behind her ear. "You and your dedication are what make Commodore the school it is. Richard Johnson isn't responsible for that, Paradise. You are. Cadence Grayson is. Lana Winters is. You guys pour your heart and soul into that place and it shows."
"I love Commodore."
I smile at her. "I know you do. It's your home. I would never do anything to jeopardize that. Everyone there knows you, little owl. They love you. They aren't going to grab pitchforks and torches to hunt me down when doing so would hurt you. Johnson's just too blind by his mission to see that."
"He didn't know everyone h-hates him," she whispers, her voice still thick with tears even though they're no longer falling freely down her round cheeks. "Cadence told him."
"Remind me to send her a giant bouquet."
Rowan gives me a tiny smile. It's not much and it wobbles after a brief moment, but seeing it loosens the knots in my stomach and fans that little flicker of hope into something bigger, brighter. I cling to it with both hands, not willing to let her talk her way out of my life. Not over a dick like Johnson.
"You're mine, pretty Paradise. And I'm yours. Richard Johnson won't ever change that. In fact, he won't be making any changes at Commodore ever again."
"You're firing him?"
"A teacher came forward today with concerns that he may be inflating test scores by changing answers on score sheets. The board is going to strongly encourage his retirement at the end of the year." I blow out a breath. "At least that was the plan. After what he did to you today, we'll be speeding that process up real quick. I want him out of there now."
"Don't fire him."
I blink at Rowan, speechless.
"L-let him retire," she says. And even though he's made her life a living hell, even though he broke her heart today, compassion wells in her eyes and spills from her lips. "He d-doesn't have anything else. He's a sad, lonely, miserable old man. But he w-wasn't always evil. He may not deserve respect or dignity, but h-his retirement shouldn't be taken from him."
I stare at her, awed. Humbled. So fucking in love, my chest actually aches.
"Please," she whispers when I don't say anything.
"I'll see what I can do," I promise her. I want to add conditions, demand that she stay with me if I give her this, but I can't do that. Staying has to be her choice, not something I force her into. I want her to choose me one more time. Not because I didn't give her a choice, but because a future with me is what she wants more than anything.
Relief fills her eyes. They track back and forth across my face as if she's memorizing me. As if this is the last time she'll ever see me. It scares the hell out of me. My entire being cries out in protest, begging for her to stay. To save me from a future of pure misery, of unparalleled hell.
Her lips tic upward. Her dimples pop out. What little composure I have left escapes in a ravenous growl. I roll on top of her, pinning her beneath me.
"What are you thinking?" I ask, desperate to know.
"I'm thinking about my mom," she says, surprising me just like she did the first time she told me that. It feels like lifetimes ago instead of a handful of days. "She always taught me to be brave and reach for what I want. To fight for it."
"Yeah?" I whisper, my heart in my throat.
She bites her lip, nods. Her gaze drifts across my face again. "I'm still scared being with me might ruin your career, but I don't want to breakup with you, Sebastian. You make my heart so happy. You make me so happy. I love you so damn much."
"Baby," I whisper, pressing my forehead to hers as another wave of awe and gratitude courses through me. This one is fierce, bowling me over. My throat burns. My heart goes wild in my chest, hammering against my ribcage in soul-shaking thumps.
"You're my paradise too," she says, wrapping her arms around me and hugging me like she's afraid I might slip through her fingers and disappear. "My giant, gorgeous, sexy Gandalf."
"Gandalf?" I chuckle, unable to stop myself.
"I felt like Frodo today," she says. "Cadence was Samwise. We threw a ring in the fire and defeated a troll. Well, I guess he's really more of a Balrog though since he tried to take you away from me. I don't know. It's a whole thing. Just go with it."
God, I love the shit that comes out of her mouth. It always seems so random, but there is always so much depth behind her statements, so much thought to them. I adjust my position, dipping my head to capture her lips with mine.
For long moments, the only sounds that come from her mouth are content little purrs and needy whines. My dick threatens to snap in half. I undress her slowly, unveiling her beautiful body bit by bit, until she's bare beneath me, staring up at me with wonder in her big brown, red-rimmed eyes.