The tripup to the orphanage felt like it took longer than normal, but Danica figured it was just the heaviness that she carried impeding her. She didn’t want to have to tell the kids good-bye. The moment she walked in the door, Polly came up to her.
“Danica—”
“I know, Ms. Polly. Is everything taken care of?”
Polly’s eyes were wide, her hands shaking. “The bank called and said the debts had been paid off. What did you do?”
Danica smiled and hugged Polly tight. “I made a deal with some people. I’m going to race again. For agreeing to race, they paid off the debt. You’ve got a clean slate now.”
Polly’s eyes welled and Danica looked anywhere but at her eyes. If Polly started crying, then Danica would start crying, and she didn’t want the kids to see tears in her eyes.
“You’ve done so much for us, Danica. I can never repay you—”
“There’s nothing to repay,” Danica argued. “You owe me nothing. I promise you. I’m going to do everything I can to make sure the kids that come through these doors have a safe place. They deserve that at the very least.”
Polly studied her closer. “But you have to leave?”
“It was part of the deal.” Danica nodded. “I’m going to race for a private team. I don’t know when I’ll be back.” Or if I’ll be back, she thought, but she couldn’t say that out loud. “I just came to tell everyone good bye before I leave.”
Polly nodded. “Stephanie has been waiting for you. She’s out in the gardens again. You know how she likes the soil.” Polly touched her fingers to Danica’s shoulders. “Thank you, Danica. You’ve given us a chance, and I can never thank you enough for that.”
And then Polly walked away wiping her eyes, determined not to show anyone that she’d been overcome by emotion. Danica cleared her throat, made sure she was presentable, and walked through the house and out the back. Stephanie was exactly where Polly had said she’d be, her hands buried deep in the soil as she transplanted potted plants into the garden. She’d discovered recently that she had some sort of gift when it came to plants. No matter if a plant looked dead, Stephanie had the ability to bring it back to life. She certainly had a green thumb.
“Danica!” Stephanie said, her eyes bright with excitement, but when she looked closer at Danica, her smile fell just a little. “Is everything okay?”
Taking a seat on the ground beside Stephanie, Danica studied her. Stephanie was sixteen, had come to the orphanage a year prior, and she’d had to work through some stuff. Kids in the foster system sometimes went through shit no child should ever have to go through, and Stephanie had seen the worst of humanity. She’d been abused, more than once, and had Danica known where to hunt the fuckers down, she would have done so. But Stephanie had declared that no one would hold sway on her and began her healing. She was so strong, and yet somehow, still in need of protection in Danica’s eyes. She would make sure Stephanie was safe for the rest of her life.
“I won’t be around for a while,” Danica admitted softly. It pained her to tell Stephanie she’d have to leave. She didn’t want her to think she was being abandoned.
“You’re leaving?”
“I plan on being back, but if I’m not, I’ve made sure you’ll be taken care of,” Danica continued.
“What do you mean, ‘if you’re not’?”
Danica sighed and considered her words carefully. “I’ve been offered a dangerous job. . .”
“Like the military?” Jeremy asked, coming around the corner. He was young, barely ten, his body too lean for his age, but he was smart as a whip.
“Something like that,” Danica smiled, and his eyes widened.
“You’re a mercenary?”
Danica chuckled and ruffled his hair, not answering the question, letting that lie linger, but Stephanie looked at her with too perceptive eyes.
“You’ll try to come back?”
“Of course, I will. The only thing that can keep me from you kids is death. I look forward to our Sunday cook outs and Wednesday dinners.”
Stephanie was silent for a moment before she grabbed Danica with dirt-covered hands and jerked her into a hug. Despite her small frame, the hug was fierce and strong. “Come back, Dani,” she whispered. “The little ones don’t understand what you do for us, but I do. You’ve made sure this is a home rather than just another stop. And I’ve not felt a home in a long time. Thank you for that. When you come back, I expect you to continue teaching me the ins and outs of an engine.”
Danica smiled and hugged her tighter. “You’re going to be a force to be reckoned with one day, Steph. I know it.”
Stephanie leaned back and wrapped her arm around Jeremy’s shoulders. He didn’t seem to understand what was wrong, still going on about Danica being a mercenary, so he didn’t realize the profoundness of Stephanie’s next words.
“I already am,” Stephanie declared. “Because of you.”
Danica swore she wouldn’t cry in front of the kids, and she just barely hid the mist in her eyes. She wrapped her arms around both kids and hugged them, before going to do the same to the others, saying her good byes.
It wasn’t until she walked out the front door and waved good bye one more time, when her back was turned to them, that she let the tears fall freely. They wouldn’t see her cry. . .
. . . but cry she did.