Feeling sluggish, my feet felt heavy as I took the stairs up to my house. It was a long day that left me feeling drained. Holding back a yawn, I pushed the key into the lock before letting myself in. The moment I opened the door, the welcoming sound of a meow brought a little bit of life back into me.
“I missed you too,” I smiled softly as I closed the door behind me. Stepping over the calico colored cat, I headed towards my kitchen to set down my belongings. I was starving and a home cooked meal sounded amazing right now. But with the kind of energy I had, ordering some pizza sounded just as good. Maybe the taste of grease would make me feel less dead inside. After giving the nearest shop a quick call, I headed to my bedroom to abandon my outfit and replace it with something much more comfy.
Searching for a movie to watch, the pizza came quick and I found myself resting on the couch with pizza in one hand and the other on top of Snickers. Eyes glued to the screen, I took in the romantic setting building up in the beginning. What could I say, even if I had given up on myself, that didn’t mean that I couldn’t enjoy watching fictional characters fall head over heels for each other.
As I continued to watch, I began to slowly lose interest in the movie as my thoughts drifted back to Mason and Olivia. I still couldn’t believe the chance of meeting him again through one of my students. It made me think that maybe it wasn’t just a coincidence that I did what I did with him. Maybe Mason could be more than just a bartender to me.
Was I a fool for thinking such a thing? After a few weekends to myself, I realized how lonely I felt now that my schedule had opened up. Even with some reassurance from Candice, it still felt wrong.
While I did push down what had happened that night, now that it had come back into the light, my feelings were beginning to resurface.
What happened between Mason and me was amazing. He had given me a night that was like no other. I had to be honest, I was pretty disappointed with this new information. Now that he knew that I was his daughter’s teacher, he definitely had no reason to have anything else to do with me. There had to be a boundary there, right?
Is that the excuse I was giving myself? What was stopping me from marching back to that bar just to see him? I was definitely scared, I could admit that much at least. Being alone with him, the sex would no longer be just something to fulfill what was missing in my heart. I wanted to learn who he actually was, lust aside. If I threw that his way, I would definitely be asking for too much.
Knowing that he had just agreed to a few hours of my time, it was that wall that I struggled to climb over. Would it really be too much to ask for a little more?
I had a choice— either give up on him and move on or go all-in. If he wanted to reject me, then that was it.
Sounding easier said than done, I figured that if we managed the cross paths once more, I’d take my chance and try to put some effort into expressing my feelings.