Taylor released a steady breath. "I was in the armory, double-checking the inventory on my team's equipment when Moros walked in. I can't remember why he said he was there, but something felt... off. I figured it was just my general dislike of the guy. I'd always thought he was an asshole. I love my job and what we do, but I hate those fucking pricks. They sit behind their desks, breathing down our necks for every little thing we do, while we're the ones risking our lives out on the streets. I know we signed up for it, but they're supposed to help us, not throw us under the bus to save their own asses. Besides, he might have been a soldier once, but he betrayed that part of himself a long fucking time ago.
"Anyway, he asked me to accompany him to his car, said he wanted to talk to me." The muscles in Taylor's jaw clenched before he continued. "There was no reason for me not to trust him. As much as I disliked him, he was the Chief of Therian Defense. If the man tells you to jump, you say, 'Yes, sir,' and fucking jump. When we got to his car, he patted my cheek, and then everything went black." Taylor closed his eyes, and Dex leaned in to put a hand on Taylor's shoulder.
"Take your time. There's no rush."
Taylor nodded. He opened his eyes, his smile tremulous at best. "Thanks." He continued, his voice unsteady, "When I woke up, I was so out of it. I had no idea where the hell I was. I couldn't see anything. There was this blinding white light in my face. I... I remember not being able to move, and I thought my heart was going to explode with how fast it was beating. The smell was rank. I thought I was dying. My body was on fire. Like my muscles were being torn from their bones, and my head felt like it was being crushed. I think I might have been sick at one point, but I blacked out soon after." Tears welled in his eyes, and he rubbed his eyes with the base of his palms.
"You're doing great," Dex said, smiling at Taylor.
Taylor breathed in deeply through his nose, then released it slowly through his mouth. He nodded. "I heard voices. Moros and some other guys, but I didn't recognize them. I think I had a seizure or something, heard shouting. Someone said I was going to die." Taylor frowned in thought. "When I next woke up, I was at work, in one of the sleeper bays. I was a little sore, but fine, so I figured I'd just had a really fucked-up dream. We were called out, and I remember shifting in the back of the BearCat. I jumped out and helped round up those frat boys. I...." He worried his bottom lip with his teeth before dropping his gaze to his hands.
"Taylor?" Dex ducked his head so he could get Taylor's attention. "Tell me."
"Everything was fine, and then... I caught your scent. I saw you running, and this overwhelming need to catch you came over me. I took off after you, and suddenly I realized I wasn't in control. I was fading. I screamed, and then everything went black." Taylor started shivering, and he wrapped his arms around himself. "I'd never been more scared than I was at that moment. I was clawing to stay, but something was dragging me into the darkness." The tears spilled over, and Taylor gulped for breath. "Everything went black, and I couldn't see, but I could hear you screaming at me, and fuck...." Taylor doubled over, his body racked with sobs. "I was hurting you, and I couldn't stop. I screamed and screamed, but something took hold, pulling.... I was on the verge of disappearing into nothingness."
"It's okay." Dex stood, leaned in, and brought Taylor into his embrace. Taylor held on for dear life, the trauma of what happened to him turning his face ashen.
Hudson's hands trembled, and keeping his tears at bay took effort. He couldn't imagine a worse fate than feeling himself fade away within his Therian form, to lose himself completely to his feral half. His inner wolf was a part of him, offered comfort, protection, and the unfaltering truth that Hudson was always present, in control. At times it was an incredible freedom, shifting into his wolf Therian form, running with the wind in his fur, his paws on the dirt, and his senses heightened. But to lose himself? To be forced into the farthest recesses of his own mind without the assurance he'd return? It was the stuff of nightmares.
Forcing past the emotions, Hudson resumed his typing. Taylor would require extensive help recovering from this event, but Hudson was grateful Taylor hadn't ended up on his examining table, the tragic victim of a deranged man.
Dex was gentle with Taylor, and Hudson's heart broke a little at Taylor's wobbly smile. Poor Taylor had it bad. He'd been very good at hiding his feelings for Dex. Hudson was aware of the aggression between Taylor and Sloane, but Hudson, like most of their unit, had assumed Taylor's interest in Dex was purely sexual. The fact Dex was marked by Sloane, an Alpha who'd ruffled Taylor's fur from the beginning, aided in the assumption Taylor simply wanted what was Sloane's.
When Taylor had calmed, Dex motioned to the door. "Sloane's here. Do you mind if he joins us?"
Hudson looked from Dex to Taylor and back. Was that a good idea?
"Sloane? Shit, he probably wants to kick my ass."
"He knows it wasn't your fault," Dex assured him.
Taylor nodded with some reluctance, and Dex stood. He pounded twice on the door, and it opened. Sloane stepped into the room, his expression softening when he saw Taylor. Clearing his throat, Sloane took a seat on the other side of Taylor. He held his hand out, and Taylor stared down at it before taking it.
"I'm glad you're okay." Taylor's voice was rough when he spoke. "I'm sorry for what happened."
"It wasn't you." Sloane released Taylor's hand and sat back. He didn't look angry or upset, and Hudson was relieved.
Taylor was having trouble meeting Sloane's gaze. "Do you believe that? After everything I've said and done?"
Sloane nodded. "I do."
"Thanks." Taylor shifted uncomfortably. "Congratulations, on, um, your engagement."
Sloane smiled, a genuine one that reached his amber eyes. He put a hand on Taylor's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Thank you. You need to get better, okay? Your team needs you, and Herrera's been driving everyone nuts."
"Why?" Taylor look puzzled.
"He's been worried about you. Whenever we see him, it's 'Do you think Taylor's okay? When do you think Taylor will be back? Why isn't Taylor back? Have you heard anything about Taylor?'"
This piece of information seemed to have thrown Taylor for a loop. His mouth opened, but no words were forthcoming. He closed his mouth and looked up at Dex for confirmation. Dex shrugged and chuckled.
"It's true. You should see him. It's like he's lost without you."
Taylor blinked at him. "Herrera? Angel Herrera?"
"You guys have been friends for like, ever, right?" Dex asked.
"Yeah. We were at the THIRDS Training Academy together. Graduated in the same class." Taylor squinted. "That was about ten years ago, I think, maybe a little longer." He appeared to be processing what Dex and Sloane told him, a frown on his face. Brows furrowed, he looked up at Dex. "He was really worried about me?"