After a cool shower, he dressed in loose pajama bottoms and a T-shirt. He headed for his bedroom. Calvin’s door was closed. Ethan didn’t like seeing it closed. It was only ever like that when Calvin was really mad at him about something. Ethan stepped in front of it, his frown deepening. The closed door was a stark reminder of the pain he’d caused. Calvin would be fine come morning. He always was.
Then why was he still standing there?
What if Calvin wasn’t all right in the morning? What if he’d had enough?
He shouldn’t go in. Calvin wanted to be on his own. He needed time. When Calvin got mad, he walked away. That’s how it had always been. It occurred to Ethan that not once in all their years of knowing each other had he tried to stop Calvin from walking away. He’d never gone after him either, thinking it’s what Calvin wanted. What if his best friend walked away in the hopes Ethan would follow? The thought hurt his heart.
Following his gut, Ethan opened the door with care. Inside, the room was dimly lit, not that it was a problem for him. The curtains were parted on the window across the room, the moonlight filtering in and landing on the bed where Calvin was asleep. He was on his stomach, one arm under his pillow, the other at his side, and his hair sticking up all over. Ethan stood by the bed watching him sleep. His black T-shirt had ridden up, and the waistband of his pajama bottoms sat low on his hips. The soft cotton jersey accentuated the curve of his ass, and it caused a stirring in Ethan’s abdomen. When had he gone from seeing Calvin as his cute best friend to his sexy lover? His thoughts went back to that night in the utility closet at Dekatria. The way Calvin had tasted on his tongue, the soft moans and sweet gasps.
As much as he wanted to feel Calvin’s skin, setting things right and making sure Calvin was okay was more important. He climbed onto the Therian-sized bed, mindful not to jostle his partner too much. Calvin was a heavy sleeper, so he barely stirred when the bed dipped under Ethan’s weight. Ethan snuggled close, allowing himself a moment to study Calvin’s face. His jaw was stubbly from having skipped a shave, yet his face remained boyish. Ethan had teased him when Bradley carded him their first time at Dekatria. His blond eyebrows and lashes only added to his sweetness.
Ethan could see it now, that whole “boy next door” vibe Austen kept going on about. Calvin could pull off an innocence he’d never been allowed to have. They’d both been forced to grow up pretty quick in their neighborhood. It seemed like a lifetime ago. The two of them huddled together, hiding from the gangs and bigger kids out to recruit them, use them, or beat them. For a long time making it to school and back in one piece had been a struggle. Once they got to school, a different kind of battle began. Yet throughout all that, Calvin never stopped fighting. The majority of his battles he could have avoided by simply not being friends with a messed-up tiger Therian kid who couldn’t talk.
A lump formed in Ethan’s throat. Unlike most people he’d met in his life, Ethan had managed to talk to Calvin. He’d felt drawn to him, comfortable and safe. When he was a kid, he’d pray every night that Calvin would always be with him. He loved Calvin, always had. Only now it was different. The softness of his skin, the plumpness of his lips, the blue of his eyes, his laugh, and his smile stirred emotions inside him he hadn’t felt before. Tentatively, Ethan ran his fingers down Calvin’s jaw. You’re amazing. Calvin’s lids fluttered open, his gaze landing on Ethan.
“Hi.” Ethan’s voice was barely a whisper, but it was enough to bring a slow smile to Calvin’s face. That smile took hold of something inside him and shook it loose. Was he really going to risk losing this? Ethan slipped his hand over Calvin’s and drew it to his chest, holding it close. “I’m sorry.”
“Me too.” Calvin’s smile dimmed. “I’m sorry I got so angry.”
“I’d like to make a pact.”
“Okay.” Calvin looked puzzled, but he waited patiently for Ethan to continue. He was always so patient.
“I won’t take stupid risks, and you won’t walk away from me when you’re mad. I don’t like going to bed with you mad at me. I’ll give you your space until you cool down, but then we talk.”
“You know what a miserable shit I can be when I’m pissed.”
Ethan brought Calvin’s hand to his lips for a kiss, his heart fluttering at the sweet blush that crept into Calvin’s cheeks. “Things between us, they’re the same, but not quite. We have to do some things differently. Work through it like… a couple.”
“A couple of what?” Calvin asked, genuinely perplexed. Ethan chuckled.
“You’re cute.” He kissed the tip of Calvin’s nose. “You know. A couple, in a relationship. Boyfriends.”
Calvin opened his mouth to respond, then closed it when nothing came out. He swallowed hard, his eyes searching Ethan’s. When he spoke, his voice was shaky. “Is that what you want? Because you know I’ll wait. However long it takes, I can wait. You know I’d never push you to do something you weren’t comfortable with.”
“It’s what I want. No more waiting. Though I might not always know what to do.”
“Who does? You really think Sloane knows what to do with Dex the majority of the time?”
Ethan chuckled. “Good point.”
“We’ll help each other. Like we’ve always done. You’re right. Some things have changed, but our friendship, having each other’s back, that’ll never change. You’re still my best friend.”
Ethan leaned into Calvin and kissed him, warmth spreading through him at the taste of his partner. A shiver replaced that warmth when Calvin parted his lips, inviting Ethan’s tongue inside. Kissing Calvin was still so new, touching him even more so. With every caress, with every touch of their lips, Ethan grew bolder. He wanted more, wanted to experience every inch of Calvin. He loved the noises he made, the way he shivered under Ethan’s touch, the way his skin flushed and made his freckles stand out. Ethan loved Calvin’s freckles. He planted kisses down Calvin’s neck and pushed his T-shirt to one side to kiss his shoulder. His skin was so soft and smooth. Ethan moved his hands down to caress Calvin’s arm before slipping his hands under Calvin’s T-shirt.
On Valentine’s Day they’d bathed together. Ethan had wanted to make the night special. He’d been romantic, leaving pink rose petals on the floor leading to the bathroom, where he’d been waiting for Calvin in a bubble bath surrounded by illuminated candles. It was his way of showing Calvin he was serious about being more than friends. He’d gotten Calvin off in the tub that evening, and Calvin had returned the favor after they’d gotten out. Since then, they’d gotten each other off, kissed and cuddled, slept in each other’s beds, but they’d been hesitant to take things further.
Ethan gently pushed Calvin onto his back and rolled over him, mindful of his weight as he pressed Calvin into the mattress. He’d dreamed of having Calvin beneath him, writhing, begging him to fuck him. Ethan remembered the way Calvin had trembled when Ethan had softly ordered him to c
ome that Valentine’s Day in the tub. He’d have to remember that. Ethan kissed Calvin, a deep, hungry kiss that showed his partner how much he wanted him. Ethan thrust his hard erection against Calvin’s thigh, making him moan. With a smile, he whispered in Calvin’s ear.
“I’d like to fuck you.”
Calvin’s soft gasp was music to Ethan’s ears. His partner nodded, gently pushing at Ethan’s chest so he could sit up. Ethan sat back on his heels, and they made quick work of their clothes, throwing them to the floor before they brought their lips back together in a frenzied kiss. Ethan wanted to taste all of him. This was a whole other side to his best friend, one he was eager to explore. Ethan nipped at Calvin’s neck as he palmed Calvin’s hard erection.
Calvin gasped, arching his back. “Please.” He pointed to the nightstand. Foreplay might have to wait for another night when they were both a little less impatient. Ethan quickly found the bottle of lube inside the drawer. He didn’t bother with the condoms. Neither of them had been with anyone since the Fourth of July that had changed everything, and they had always been safe. Both were tested regularly at work, and their most recent tests once again came back clean. Calvin didn’t even question it.
Ethan’s heart was racing, his pulse going at full speed. There were butterflies in his stomach, and he swore he’d never seen anything more beautiful than the man lying naked before him, exposed and begging for his touch. Ethan lubed up his cock as he knelt between Calvin’s legs. He bent to kiss Calvin’s lips and took hold of Calvin’s cock, stroking him as Ethan pulled at his own dick. Calvin moaned and writhed, his cheeks flushed pink in the dim lighting. Ethan released Calvin and lined himself up with one hand while taking hold of Calvin’s leg with the other. He slowly pushed himself in, groaning at the sweet pressure of Calvin’s tight hole.