Then he and Logan talked about the restaurant business, and about Logan’s newest venture. As they’d talked, she’d felt strange again. As though his life was nothing to do with her.
And really, it wasn’t. Not unless their baby was involved.
She took a deep breath and forced a smile onto her lips. “We were supposed to be talking about the baby tonight. And custody plans. Did you still want to do that?”
He cleared his throat, his eyes catching hers. “Yeah,” he said, his voice gruff. “We should.”
Ellie walked in to take their final plates. “Would you guys like coffee? We have decaf.”
“Not for me, thank you.” Courtney sat back and rubbed her stomach. “I’m so full I don’t think I’ll eat for a week.”
“Ah, but you’re eating for two,” Ellie told her with a smile. “It’s your duty.”
“I like the sound of that.” Courtney couldn’t help but smile at Ellie. There was a natural ease to her. No wonder she and Dan were so successful. They were the consummate hosts.
She felt a little frisson of excitement about supplying them with eggs, if they were good enough. It would be nice to have a few more friends. Goodness knew she needed them.
When Ellie had gone, Courtney looked back at Logan. His eyes were speculative as they scanned her face. As though he was trying to figure something out.
“So I’m planning to nurse the baby. For at least twelve months if it works out.” She gave him a smile. “But I can pump and give you bottles for when it’s your time with him or her.”
He nodded, his eyes serious. “I think I’ll fly back here for my custody time. For the first year, at least. I don’t want you or the baby having to fly to Boston when they’re so little.”
“Oh.” She blinked with surprise. “I didn’t realize you’d do that.” She was glad, though. The distance between here and Boston scared her. She wasn’t sure how she’d feel being so far from her baby.
“I want to make this as easy as possible.” He smiled softly. “For both of us.”
“Will you stay with your family?”
“I haven’t thought about that yet. I guess at first I will. But I might look into buying. It makes sense to have a permanent base here for the baby.”
“That’s a big commitment.”
He grinned at her. “Not as big as having a baby.”
“You’re right.” She let out a laugh. “I guess we’re doing this the wrong way round.”
He tipped his head to the side. “I guess we are. But it feels okay, you know? Like this was somehow meant to happen.”
“You think?”
“Don’t you?” he asked her.
She bit her lip, thinking about his question. “Maybe you’re right,” she conceded. “I guess I was shocked at first. But it’s amazing how quickly you get used to something like this.” Maybe even excited, though she wasn’t sure how to vocalize that. “It’s like my future’s suddenly become a little more clear.”
He nodded, his lip quirking up. “That’s exactly it. It makes you realize what’s important and what isn’t. Gray told me that being a father makes you grow up like nothing else does. It’s not about being a certain age, or having money, or even being in control of your own destiny. It’s about being responsible for something so damn important you’d do anything to make it work.”
Her mouth felt dry. There was an intensity to his stare that made her heat up. She wanted to bask in his warmth.
“How often do you think you’ll come back?” she asked.
“I want to try for every other weekend. I know from watching my nephews how quickly kids can grow. I don’t want to miss a thing.”
She nodded. “That can work. And there’s always phone calls and Facetime and maybe we can visit you too. Until the baby’s old enough to come visit on their own.”
“You’re making this seem easy,” he teased.
“Yeah, well so are you. I thought you’d want nothing to do with us when I told you. You were so shocked.”