Despite not being as easy to deny anymore when he had clearly been more than attracted this weekend, I didn’t want to admit it because I didn’t know what it meant. So, scoffing, eye-rolling, and head shaking, it was.
“Oh, are we still denying?” Vera asked.
“I thought you said she admitted to caring about him,” Nova said.
“She did,” Vera defended. “Which is why I figured she was wearing the crop top.”
“And makeup,” Nova added.
They went back and forth like they were the only two on the call. “Hey bitches, I’m right freaking here.”
“Yeah,” Vera agreed. “So, explain what’s going on. What changed to put you all back in your denial? What happened?”
“I’m not…” My weak denial faded, leaving me in silence. They continued to stare with expectant looks until I couldn’t stand it anymore. “What?” I snapped.
“We’re waiting for the rest of it,” Vera said with a wave of her hand to continue.
“Rest of what?”
Deny. Deny. Deny.
Nothing to see here.
Nothing to admit.
Nope.
Look away.
They didn’t look away. In fact, Nova actually began humming the Jeopardy song, and Vera leaned back in her chair like she had all day.
Assholes.
The best assholes in the world and ones I knew I shouldn’t have even bothered hiding from. I knew that facing them meant facing me and everything inside I tried to keep hidden under a blanket, shoved in a corner, duct-taped, and chained into a tight ball, so I didn’t have to look at it.
I didn’t want to look at it.
But the more they stared, the more it rattled until the jangling took over every inch of my body, filling up more and more, crawling its way up my throat until it exploded.
“FINE!” I shouted. “Oh, my god! We slept together, and it was the best sex I’ve ever had, okay?” Their eyes widened comically large at my outburst, but I wasn’t done. Now that I’d started, it was all coming out. “And oh, my fucking god. He’s just as big as I imagined. And his mouth. Holy fuck. It says the filthiest things like he’s talking directly to my pussy before he does even dirtier things to it.”
“Yes,” someone shouted off-screen. “Fuck yeah! Fucking told you.”
“Is that Parker?” I asked. “What the hell is going on over there?”
“Dammit,” Nova hissed. Next thing I knew, she had her wallet in hand, digging out a bill.
“I fucking told you they’d fuck,” Parker said, appearing to snatch the hundred from Nova before looking at the screen. “You can tell Nico he can pay me next time we’re together.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I shrieked. “Another bet?”
Vera rolled her eyes and released an exaggerated sigh. “You used to take bets on everything.”
“Like when?”
“How about how many shots of tequila it would take for Nova to dance on a bar?”
“Not many,” I muttered before shaking my head to focus. “But this is different.”
“Oh, please,” Vera exclaimed. “It isn’t, and you know it. You’re just pouty because all of a sudden, you’re the one with boy woes.”
I sputtered like I had at every other proclamation in this conversation. “I’m Raelynn fucking Vos. I don’t do boy woes.”
“Yet, here you are,” Vera said with a little too much gloating.
“Speaking of, what’s next?” Nova asked. “Are you together now?”
I snorted just to switch up my sounds of denial. “No.”
“Ummm… okay,” she said slowly. “So, what are you going to do now?”
This time I couldn’t produce a single sound—not a scoff or a snort or an eek of anything because wasn’t that the million-dollar question. I swallowed as their faces shifted from expectant to knowing.
“We haven’t talked about it,” I admitted with a wince.
My two best friends gasped in unison, slapping their hands to their chests. “I’m shocked,” Nova proclaimed.
“Me, too,” Vera added with a bland tone. “I never would have guessed.”
“You’re not fucking funny,” I deadpanned.
“We’re hilarious,” Nova said.
“And we know you,” Vera explained. “Of course, you’d avoid all conversation with Austin about how you had sex and needed to decide what the next step was.”
“So why did you ask?”
“We didn’t,” Vera said. “We asked what you are going to do now.”
“What do you want to happen next?” Nova clarified. “Are you going to give the marriage thing a try?”
“No. No,” I objected immediately. “I don’t want to be married. I can’t be.”
“I mean, you can,” Nova mused.
“I said I would never get married. It’s not who I am.”
“People change,” she said softly.
“Not with this!” I snapped. “I just—I can’t. And I don’t know what’s next, and I don’t know how to talk about it, and I don’t want to because I don’t know what that looks like, so I’m avoiding it like a little bitch. Okay? I’m a big fat scaredy-cat.”
“Raelynn…” Vera said softly, but I couldn’t handle that right now. I didn’t want to handle any of it.
“All I do know is that I just had the best sex of my life with my best friend and that I have to go visit his grandparents next weekend, so why not just enjoy the time we have to stay married. What’s the point of talking about it now and possibly creating a shit show? At least more than it already is. Especially if we don’t have to.”