Speechless, I just stare at him, soaking in his confession.
He looks at me almost longingly. “I asked you this morning and you never did answer me. How do you feel about me?"
I shrug my shoulders and just stare back at him. He puts his hands on each side of my neck, forcing me to look at him. "Last night, you said a lot of things but you also had drank a lot of whiskey. I need to know, Haven, how you feel about me."
I swallow and nod my head. I try to forget about all the times I’ve loved someone and they’ve turned me away. My mom left me. My father moved away. I can’t lose Parker too. "Are you sure you want to know?"
He laughs then. "Yes, of course I do."
I can feel the nerves shooting through my body, but I have to say it. "I love you, Parker. I've loved you for a long time."
He lifts his hand to the side of my face and looks at me full of surprise. “Really?”
I want to shake my head. How could he not have known? “Yes, really. I’ve been in love with you since the first day I met you.”
His reply is instant. “We were ten years old, Haven.”
I nod slowly. “I know that. And I knew then that I wanted you in my life forever.”
He cups my chin. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”
I shrug, almost embarrassed. “Look at you and then look at me.”
Chapter 14
Parker
I start to cut her off, but she puts her hand on my chest to stop me. “Look, I’m not cutting on myself. I like me, but I also know that you and I are very different... you could have anyone, Parker.”
I take a deep breath. “And I want you.”
I kiss her then because there’s no more holding back. I need the taste of her on my lips. Our lips mesh in a heated, thorough kiss. She shifts on my lap, straddling me. I could stay just like this forever and never want for anything again.
She breaks the kiss and looks at me. She looks happy, and I know my own face reflects the same. “I want you.”
Her voice is barely a whisper, but hearing her desire forces a shiver down my spine. I look at her, not wanting to pressure her but knowing I don’t have it in me to refuse her either. “Uh, are you sure?”
She nods insistently. “Yes. I always dreamed you would be the one...”
She stops, and I’m pretty sure I know what she’s going to say. I urge her to continue because I want to hear her say it. “The one to what?”
She blushes prettily. “I want you to take my virginity.”
My cock twitches in my pants. Just the thought of being buried inside her makes me harder than I ever thought possible. But no matter how much I want to have her, the responsible side of me comes out. “We have forever, Haven. We don’t have to rush things.”
I hold my breath, hoping that she doesn’t think I’m refusing her. The truth is I’m weak when it comes to her. She must know it too, because her next movement makes me almost crazy. She tries to get up and I hold on to her. I may be willing to wait, but I still want to hold her.
“Let me up, please.”
I grit my teeth and release her. She stands up, facing me. Slowly, she pulls down her pants and kicks them to the side.
I swear I almost forget to breathe.
She grabs the hem of her sweatshirt and pulls it over her head. My mouth falls open.
She is standing in front of me bare-breasted with nothing but her panties on. I sit up and put my hands on her hips. If this is a test, I’m going to lose.
I lean my forehead against her belly. Fuck, give me strength.
Her hands go across my shoulders and down my back before coming up again. I lift my head and look at her. “You need to make sure this is what you want, Haven. You may want me to take your virginity, but I want it all. I may be your first, but I’m also going to be your last.”
She blinks. “I want that. You have no idea how much I want that.”
Before I can talk myself out of it, I stand up and pull her into my arms. She wraps her arms and legs around me and holds on. I stalk with her down the hall and kick her bedroom door open. I walk into the room and try to be calm and together about it, but my heart is racing so fast it feels like it’s about to come out of my chest.
I sit on the bed, keeping her on my lap. I take a few deep breaths, and she looks at me curiously. “What’s wrong?”