I sit here in the room all night long as the sun slowly starts to rise, and even after six hours of sitting in the dark room, I know I will never ever be able to love her like I want to. I know if I say anything to her, I risk never being able to be next to her again. I risk never getting to see her smile again. I risk never getting to hear her laughter anymore. I risk living the rest of my life without her in it. And it’s a risk I’m not willing to take. I’d rather love her from afar in secret than not at all. It’s a sacrifice I’m going to have to make, and I know that I’ll never get over her.
Chapter 15
Alex
“What is that noise?” I ask of the sound that I keep hearing over and over again. “Is that whistles?” I open my eyes. The hair in front of my face tries to block out the sun, but it shines straight into one eye, making me groan. “No,” I moan, and my mouth feels like I swallowed a whole fist of sand. I turn my head to the other side when I hear the noise again. I want to get up but I’m lying facedown in the middle of my bed. “What is that?”
I open one eye again and see the clock on the bedside table showing me it’s nine fourteen. My eyes go to the water bottle right next to the clock, and I reach out my hand to grab it, but I’m in the middle of my bed. The energy to get the bottle is more than I can give right now. The throbbing in my head starts. I try to swallow, but my tongue feels even bigger. “Ugh,” I moan, trying to pull myself to the side of the bed. I move not even an inch when I try to reach for the bottle only to come up at the same spot. “Why didn’t I study how to make things move with my mind?” I mumble when the whistling starts again.
“Good morning.” I hear Dylan’s voice, and I blow out to try to move the hair from my face, but nothing happens. I hear him chuckle and move my hand up to push the hair away from my face. Opening my eyes, I see him standing there in gym shorts and nothing else. His hair is wet from the shower he probably just took because I can smell his soap from here. He leans against the doorjamb. “How are we feeling this morning?”
I’m about to answer him when the whistling starts again. “Do you hear that?” I try to turn to the other side, but the sun feels like a spotlight shining straight onto my face. I turn my head and lie back down on the pillow. “Is it just me who hears that?”
“Do you mean the whistling?” he asks, coming into the room and going to the window where he shuts it, and the whistling stops. “Uncle Matthew gave it to all the kids to prevent them from being kidnapped. It’s called the stranger danger whistle.”
“How many strangers are on our private beach?” I ask as I hear him close the shades.
“Zero,” he says, and I open my eyes looking over my shoulder at him. He walks to the side of the bed, and I hear the sound of pills. “But they just like blowing the whistle for fun.”
“You need to go out there,” I say. “And take them all away.”
He laughs, and when I watch him come back, he hands me two pills and then sits on the side of the bed, handing me the water bottle I tried to combat crawl to. “Take these. You’ll feel better.”
I turn to sit up on the bed, my head pounding even harder. I put the pills in my mouth and the water feels so good when it finally hits my tongue. I finish the whole bottle and then lie back down on the bed. “I’m assuming you’re going back to bed.”
I roll to the other side of the bed, grabbing the cover. “I’d appreciate if you stop judging me.” I close my eyes. “It’s a judge-free zone.”
I ignore the need to open my eyes and look at him again. “I’ll be in the living room.” I feel the bed move when he gets up.
“I don’t need a babysitter,” I state, annoyed that I like the fact he’s going to be staying back with me and then annoyed he’s staying back with me.
He doesn’t say anything and sleep comes right away, and when I open my eyes again, I see it’s just past three. I think about staying in bed all day long when my bladder starts to burn, and I have to get up. I swing my legs over the bed, and when I get up, I have to close my eyes and breathe through my nose as I make my way to the bathroom.