Reaching behind me and digging through the bag I’d brought with all of Toby’s stuff in it, I pulled one out. “Well, would you look here? I do, as it happens.”
Her eye twitched as she looked from it to me, likely gauging if I was serious or not.
Just to make sure she knew I was, I added, “You wouldn’t deprive Sadie of that joy, would you? I even charged my phone so I could take photos and then call her so she could see it firsthand.”
Addy’s lower jaw slid to the side, but then she got up and snatched it out of my hand.
“You don’t think I’ll put it on, do you?” When I didn’t say anything, she hopped over the edge of the hot tub. “Fine, I’ll be back in a minute.”
Smiling, I rooted around in the bag for my phone and made sure I had it ready for when she got back. Sure enough, two minutes later, she stomped out of the house, her cheeks pink as she tugged at the suit.
“To be fair, it was way funnier when it was you potentially wearing this.”
“I beg to differ,” I snorted, taking picture after picture. “This is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”
Glaring at me, she moved to get back in the tub, but I held my hand up. “Stop. Sadie needs to see this before you get under the water.”
The phone only rang twice before it was answered, and I quickly jabbed my finger on the screen to change the camera to the forward-facing one so Sadie could see Addy as soon as it connected fully.
“Santana, Sadie’s just co— Oh, what the fuck is that?” Elijah, Sadie’s husband, and Addy’s soon-to-be brother-in-law, bellowed. “My brother’s a sick bastard. Put some clothes on for the love of Christ, Addy.”
If it was even possible, the blush on her cheeks deepened as she put her hands on her hips. “I am wearing something, you-you- big fat meanie.”
“You tell him, girl,” I whispered, winking and not taking the camera off her.
“I mean put on something other than the hair,” Elijah begged.
There was a choking noise, and when I looked at the screen, I noticed Elijah had put the phone on a table. All I could see was his head pointing down like he was looking at the ground. Then the choking noise came again, but this time I saw his shoulders move with it and figured that he was gagging.
“Have they started selling eye bleach?” he rasped to no one in particular that I could tell
“Not that I’m aware of, but you could always try holy water,” I offered, trying to be as helpful as possible.
I mean, it wasn’t his fault he’d answered the call for his wife, was it?
“Not enough,” he choked, pressing his fist against his mouth. Just then, his head snapped up, and he looked to the side at the same moment as I heard Sadie calling his name. “Phone.”
Our friend’s face filled the screen, and I waited for her to make sense of what she was seeing. “I thought we took you for a wax?”
Throwing her arms in the air, Addy clipped, “This isn’t my actual body. That mean bitch made me wear this.”
“She made you wear copious amounts of body hair?”
“No, the swimsuit!” she hissed back, looking like she was close to screaming.
“But you said you’d bought Santana one, not yourself. Why is this so confusing?” Sadie asked, her British accent making it even funnier—to me. I should probably stress that last point because Addy sure as hell wasn’t finding it amusing at all.
Karma. Mwahahaha!
“I did buy her one, but then hottie Remy saw her in it while she was bathing Toby,” Addy explained.
“No!” Sadie gasped, her hand covering her mouth.
“I told you all of this. Why are you acting like you didn’t know?”
Sadie’s hand dropped, and she shrugged, looking sheepish. “I wasn’t sure if Santana knew that I knew.”
“Oh, I knew that you knew,” I assured her. “There was no way Addy would have kept that a secret.”
“So you bought Addy one to get your own back?” Sadie asked, glancing at something over the top of her phone that made her shoulders shake.
Hitting the button to change cameras, she switched to the forward-facing one that showed another phone screen with a text from Elijah to Marcus saying, “Your fiancée has the body hair of a Wookie. I’ll never look at you the same way again.”
“What? What did you guys just do?” Addy demanded as I burst out laughing.
Not wanting to answer the question, I said to Sadie, “I burned the one she got me after the incident and then ordered one for Addy online. They very helpfully had one that matched her skin tone just as perfectly as the one she got me matched mine.”