E is for Everett (Men of Alphabet Mountain) - Page 62

“Next time I have to get more than a half dozen,” I said.

“Just get a half dozen of the caramel bacon ones. I’ll eat those forever,” he said, laughing.

“Me too,” I said. “Though I might regret it any moment now.”

“If you do, I’ll help you again,” he said.

“I appreciate that,” I said and turned so I could look him in the eye. I felt like I hadn’t really addressed my absence yet, other than explaining the reason. I hadn’t apologized. I felt like I needed to.

“So, what do we do now?” he asked. “Like, how do we go forward from here?”

“Before we can do that, I need to apologize for how I acted.”

“No, stop,” he said. “You don’t need to apologize.”

“Yes, I do,” I said. “I ghosted you. And I shouldn’t have. I should have at least responded to you, just to let you know we were still okay.”

“I understand though,” he said. “You were scared. I get it.”

“I hope you do.”

“I do,” he said, then sighed. “Honestly, I had been expecting you to leave. Good things don’t stay in my life, and I had never really had a relationship like this before. I figured you were a city girl from Chicago and that you would end up going back there. I was just a happy distraction while you were stuck here with your parents’ diner.”

My breath was stuck in my chest as I listened. It hurt to hear that he thought that way and, even worse, that I had done anything to legitimize it.

“I am so sorry,” I said. “I didn’t know you thought that.”

“It’s stupid,” he said. “It’s my own insecurities. I shouldn’t have projected them on you. I just made things worse inside my own head.”

“Look at me,” I said. “I promise, if I ever have a problem with you, I will tell you. I will never ghost you again.”

“I believe you,” he said, a small flick of the corner of his mouth going up. “And I will work on not projecting my past on you.”

“We need to learn to talk to each other better,” I said. “Me ignoring you worried you that badly, and my need for space drove you away. I’m just so used to having to deal with things on my own that I don’t know how to handle having a partner. I need to work on that.”

“But you want to?”

“Of course, I do,” I said. “Do you?”

“Hell yes,” he said and grinned. “As long as you’ll have me.”

“That’s a long time,” I said, grinning.

“I’ll hold you to that,” he said.

“Good.”

I went to bed that night in his arms. My stomach had settled a lot, and I felt much calmer and happier. We snuggled under the covers and watched bad television. He even uncovered my secret love of fake wrestling, and we spent a couple hours watching it and talking about how much we loved the silliness and drama of it.

I slept soundly for a good seven hours and then snapped awake to the feeling of my stomach rumbling. I tried to slide out of bed without him noticing, but he woke up as soon as I was out of his arms. I stumbled to the bathroom, thankful for the nightlight in there, and he followed me in, turning on the hall light instead of the bathroom one to save my eyes.

The sun was up, and when I finally finished puking, he helped me clean up and I brushed my teeth before joining him in the hallway. He was carrying a mug of coffee and a glass of ice water. Offering his arm, he led me out onto the back porch and sat me on a bench. With both beverages beside me, he went back into the bathroom, grabbed a large blanket, and cuddled up with me.

As the sun rose, we each took sips of the coffee and I listened to his heart. I could do without the morning stomach gymnastics, but if this was the kind of life I would lead for a while, I thought I might be able to handle it.

29

EVERETT

The basket of muffins sitting on my passenger’s seat was incredibly tempting to dig into, but I held my own on the way in. It was Monday morning, and I’d spent an entire weekend babying Helen as much as she would allow me to. Then in the middle of the night, she wanted to make muffins. We made them fresh and let them cool as we went to nap for a while before I had to leave for work. She was supposed to go into the diner later in the day, and I told her to stay. I had left a key for her, so she could come and go as she pleased.

It was a big step. Letting her have access to my house at any time was a way of telling her she was at home with me. I knew it was fast, but we were on the speed course already anyway. She had a baby inside her. Just the thought of that made me giddy in a way I didn’t really know how to properly process. I wasn’t sure I had ever felt this happy.

Tags: Natasha L. Black Erotic
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