It was a scene she’d shared with no one—not even her mother. The hurt was too deep.
Aware that Ben was watching her closely, she summoned a brisk note to her voice. ‘So I think it makes sense for Jodie and me to move out. For a while, anyway.’
‘Where will you go?’
‘I’m not sure yet. I need to talk to Mum first; it could be I’ve got this all wrong. But I can find a flat on a short-term let. Thanks to you I’ll be able to afford it.’
‘With the money you wanted to put aside for Jodie?’
‘Plans change. It’s Jodie I need to think about. I don’t want to move far from her school, and I need to be near Mum. She’ll need support. But, like I said, it could be I’m jumping the gun. My dad may not want to come back to London, or Mum may decide it’s best to leave him in Newcastle.’
Ben thought for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck. ‘If you do need to move at short notice, why don’t you and Jodie come and stay with me for a bit?’
Huh? ‘Stay with you? We couldn’t do that.’
‘Why not? I have an enormous house in London. It’s got five bedrooms, four bathrooms. It makes sense. If you need somewhere to stay temporarily, use my house. It would save you money—and hassle.’
‘But it’s your home.’
‘No matter. I’m not in it that much. It’s big enough that we’d all have plenty of space. We’d barely even notice each other.’
As if...
Her hormones could sniff him out at fifty paces. And why was she even thinking about this? Because it might make practical sense—nothing more.
‘That’s really kind of you and I will consider it if we need to move out.’
‘Just let me know. I can have a car or a van at your door to pick you and Jodie up whenever you need it.’
‘That’s really kind...’ she repeated, and as she spoke the pilot’s voice boomed out, announcing that landing was imminent.
* * *
Once home, Sarah let herself in and tiptoed into the lounge. Seeing her mum was still awake, she felt her heart turn over with love.
‘You didn’t need to wait up. It’s the early hours of the morning.’
‘I got some sleep. I just got up early,’ Mary said. ‘Welcome back, sweetheart.’
She hugged her mum, saw the worry lines around her eyes and said, ‘I’ll quickly go and look at Jodie and then you need to tell me about Dad.’
A couple of minutes later they sat together, as they had so many times before, cocoa in hand, and Mary sighed.
‘He sounds like he means it. I spoke with his doctor. He’s been sober for two weeks now. But he’s not finding it easy. It’s hard for him to face up to where he is without the bottle to make reality a bit blurry.’ Tears glistened in her brown eyes. ‘I don’t know how it’s come to this, Sarah. He’s been homeless—on the streets. But he says he wants to turn things around, and when I offered to go and see him he sounded so grateful I could have cried. I did cry, in fact. We talked for hours. He’s thinking about coming back to London. He thinks it might help him.’
‘Did...?’ Sarah had to clear her throat to get rid of the hitch. ‘Did Dad mention me?’
‘Yes. I think he’s deeply ashamed. He didn’t tell me the full story. I’m not sure he can even remember exactly what he said when he last saw you, but whatever he can recall I think he regrets very much.’
The words were a balm—though not enough to erase the raw truth of that last meeting.
‘I’m glad he mentioned me, and I hope that Dad does it—I hope he succeeds. And if it’s easier for you both—if he is serious about coming back here—I can move out for a bit.’
Mary shook her head vehemently. ‘Absolutely not. This is your home. Yours and Jodie’s. I would never ask or want you to leave it. Not even for your dad.’
‘I know that, Mum. I’m offering. Just to move out for a bit. That way if you want to you can bring him back here, or he can come and visit. Or even stay here for a bit whilst you sort out somewhere more permanent.’ Sarah’s gaze skittered away. ‘In fact, Ben said we could stay with him.’
Her mother stared at her. ‘Stay with Ben Gardiner?’