Chapter 1
Kallie
Kallie felt James approach her from behind, a dark shadow hovering over her shoulder. She looked up into his eyes and found him eyeing Ash carefully and she wasn’t sure what to do. Ash had shown up at her door with the most beautiful bouquet of flowers she’d ever been given and dressed in a suit that made her want to rip at it until nothing but his bare skin was underneath her fingertips.
“Who’s at the door?” James asked.
“Um ... it’s a new friend of mine,” Kallie said.
Her eyes flickered over to Ash and they lit up with something she couldn't quite define. And she didn’t want to take the time to analyze it. She was standing in a very volatile situation and she didn’t know how to diffuse it. Maybe Ash was being protective? But what did he have to be protective over? Was he upset that another man was in her apartment? Surely not. Ash didn’t strike her as the jealous type. As the possessive type. That was James’s type, and the posturing he was doing was right in time with his personality.
Kallie felt James slip his arm around her, but she shrugged off his touch.
“Would you like to come in, Ash?” she asked.
It was then his eyes dropped to hers, and she held her breath for his answer.
“I’m good,” Ash said as he shook his head. “Though if you’re free later, I’d like to see you. If you’re interested.”
Kallie’s heart dropped to her toes. She wanted him to come in. To make himself at home while she showed James the way out. Speechless, she watched as Ash’s eyes panned up to James one last time, then he turned delicately on his heel and walked away. Her eyes followed him down the hallway, until he disappeared into an elevator, and he chanced a glance up before she disappeared.
Was that ... hurt she saw?
How had Ash found her?
James put his hand on her shoulder as she shut the door. She moved from beneath the heat of his hand and went into her kitchen. She wanted to get the beautiful flowers into some water. She was also curious as to what the card attached to them said. But she didn’t want to read it while James was lingering, and he really was making a show of it.
She could feel his eyes on her as she filled a vase with water and placed the flowers in their new home.
“Who was that, Kallie?” James asked.
“Just a friend,” she said.
“That bouquet of flowers is easily four hundred dollars.”
“Can my friends not have money?”
“I don’t take any of my female friends expensive bouquets of flowers.”
“No. You take them your dick,” she said plainly.
“Are you saying I have competition?”
“There’s no competition,” Kallie said as she turned around. “That’s a friend, and you’re my ex.”
“I thought you said you were going to give us another chance.”
“I never said anything.”
“Kallie ... look. I just—”
James moved at lightning speed toward her and pressed her body against the kitchen counter. The heat of his body drew her mind back to fonder memories. When the two of them were naked in each other’s arms and she was the only thing in his eyes. Kallie closed her eyes and tried to bat them away. Tried to ignore how good James’s hand felt against her cheek. She needed to be strong. She needed to get him out of her apartment.
But his body was so familiar and the future they had planned started to slam down onto her mind. Children and the home they’d already started piecing together. She was supposed to be in that home now. Moved in and settled into the decadence James was hell-bent on surrounding her with. Kallie opened her eyes and found James staring down at her. Those puppy dog eyes that worked so well and the gentle caress of his thumb that always relaxed her.
It still relaxed her.
He seemed earnest enough when he was talking about them getting back together, even though Kallie was upset. Angry. Teetering on hatred for the man that touched her skin. But the history between the two of them was thick. And it wasn’t all bad. She wanted to linger on the bad. Kallie wanted to keep the bad at the forefront of her mind, so her decision could be easier.
But it wasn’t all bad.
There were all the nights he spent taking care of her when she was sick. Doting on her when she had her tonsils removed and taking off work to stay in bed with her. There were all the nights he stayed up late with her while she studied for her exams, making sure she had enough caffeine and quizzing her to make s
ure she was retaining the information. There were all the times he abandoned plans with his family to do things with hers. All the times he paid for things he didn’t need to. Like her mother’s medical bills when she had her car accident and her father’s medications when they were riding paycheck to paycheck with her mother not working.
It wasn’t all bad.
But when Kallie opened her eyes, she could see James consumed by something else. A possessiveness she’d come to ignore and shrug off as “just James.” But a possessiveness nonetheless. He looked filled with a new urgency. And his eyes weren’t very focused. Despite his body pinning her to the kitchen counter and his thumb stroking her cheek, he looked as if he was elsewhere.
“I love you, Kallie,” James said.
And oh, how sweet those words were to her ears.
She watched James’s lips approach. Watched as the man she’d dedicated years of her life to drop his face to hers. Her heart slammed against her chest and her gut churned with nerves. Her mind told her to go for it and her heart screamed at her to stop. Her knees grew weak as her hands curled into the edge of the counter, and at the last second, she turned her head.
Felt James’s lips fall to her cheek.
She expected him to step back. To scoff and get angry and start yelling like he did sometimes. But instead, he nuzzled into her skin. Sent shivers down her spine. He wrapped his arm around her back, pulling her closer to him the way he always did. His arms never ceased to make her feel safe. Loved. Wanted in his presence. Kallie hated the way she melted into him. Melted into the man who had indulged so many women during their relationship.
“I’m sorry,” he said with a whisper into her skin. “I was a fool. An idiot. A coward. I felt entitled to the things around me and I hurt the only person I’ve ever truly loved.”
Kallie’s eyes fluttered closed and she leaned into his lips. James puckered them against her skin again, and she felt herself heating underneath his soft touch.
“I wasn't a man on our wedding day,” he said lowly. “I was a coward. I panicked with all the eyes on us. With the pressure for things to be perfect. With my mother running around like a panicked bulldog yelling at everyone and making sure the place settings were correct. All of it was so wrong for us, Kallie. And I panicked. I’m sorry. I panicked in all the wrong ways.”
He pressed his lips into her neck and Kallie sighed. Her head fell forward and her hands gripped his shoulders. Her body was caving on her. Betraying her in all the worst ways.