Faith felt her heart swell with happiness and a small amount of fear.
“What about Josie? She was the only one you wanted all this with, Adam. I don’t want to be a back-up prize because your dreams with her are gone.” She swallowed down her tears. Alana had showed her an old picture of Adam and Josie in high school. Josie had been petite and thin with long blonde hair. Adam had looked down at her with such love it had made Faith feel jealous. Then she felt horrible for feeling jealous.
Adam stood up and knelt at her feet. He grabbed her hand, rubbing his fingers over her knuckles in a soothing motion. “I regret telling you all those things, Faith. I said them out of fear. I was too scared to take that chance of losing someone I loved again. Then when you refused to have anything to do with me, I realized I did lose you. Only it was worse because you were alive and well. My heart ached and I had no choice but to face the truth. That was all before the fire. I planned on wooing you with flowers and gifts and kisses.”
“I was hurting too, Adam. To know that the man I loved wanted nothing to do with me or my baby because we weren’t who he dreamed of it caused me a lot of self-confidence issues and pain,” she said honestly. “All my life I wanted only one thing. Love. How ironic I found it with a man in love with someone else. Someone I can’t compete with.”
He pulled her out of the chair. He sat down and pulled her down to his lap. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her forehead. He rocked back and forth and it soothed her inner turmoil.
“Sorry doesn’t make up for the pain I caused you,” he began slowly. She heard pain, sincerity, and determination in his voice. “I watched you like a stalker for months. My heart knew I wanted you, but my head always made excuses to step back. It’s not about competing, Faith. I loved Josie, but that was in the past and that time is behind me. I dealt with the grief long ago, but fear of feeling that pain is what kept me apart from you. I don’t expect you to just forget all the things I said to you in one day. What I am asking for is a chance. Open your mind and your heart up and let me prove to you that I have changed. I am serious about me and you, Faith.”
“One weekend won’t fix all of our problems.” She had to be realistic. It would be so easy to just lean on him, but when the rug got pulled from under her it would hurt more than ever.
“I know,” he agreed. “But it’s a beginning.”
Faith absorbed all that he was saying into her soul. Should she take a leap of faith and hope Adam was serious this time?
“Okay. Let’s take this weekend and really get to know each other,” she agreed. She tried to smile but she ruined it with a yawn. “Sorry.”
“You work too hard,” he observed, ruffling her hair. “Let’s go lie down. I will hold you and make sure you rest.”
He gave her a tender look and she nodded. She let him lead her into the cabin and the one bedroom. Last night he had stayed on the couch. She hadn’t made the bed, so they silently slipped underneath the covers. Adam held her and caressed her swollen belly. The baby moved around as if liking his touch as much as she did.
“I hope she has red hair,” he whispered, “and blue eyes.”
“I hope she has your hazel eyes. I love the color of your eyes,” she admitted, feeling comfortable and sleepy.
“Have you thought of any names?” he asked with real interest.
Faith shook her head. “Alana gave me a baby book but I haven’t looked at it yet. I wanted your opinion, but I wasn’t sure if you would want to be a part of that. I thought you were going to the doctor appointments with me because your brother bullied you into it. Alana told me he wanted you to get your head out of your ass and marry me.”
Adam chuckled. “Sounds like Noah. I went with you because it gave me an excuse to spend time with you. If I asked you out on a date, you would have rejected me right away.”
Faith felt bad now. She rubbed his chest with her hand. “I’m sorry. Spending time with you w
as too painful for me. I didn’t want to be your obligation or your burden. I still don’t.”
He turned until they were face to face. He held her face in his hand so she couldn’t look away. “You are never a burden to me, Faith. I have been obsessed with you for more than a year now. Coffee is not my favorite drink. I only went in there to moon over you. Alana knew this and encouraged me to talk to you. I was a nervous wreck around you, but I thought it was simple desire.”
“Isn’t it?”
“No,” he said firmly. “I have felt desire for other women and it faded quickly. With you it was different. I thought about you all the time. I like how I feel when I am around you. When you smile at me, I feel all warm and mushy inside. I find myself thinking of ways to just catch a glimpse of you. I just want you to keep an open mind about us. Let me make it up to you.”
Faith placed a soft kiss on his lips as an answer. She let her lips linger for a second. In it she put all the emotions she felt for him from the beginning. More than desire. Care. Tenderness and love.
He smiled and caressed her hair. “Thank you, Faith. You won’t regret this.”
She laid her head back on his chest and fell into a peaceful sleep.
* * * *
Faith was feeling warm and cozy under the blankets. She felt rested, but that didn’t mean she wanted to move.
“Come on, lazy. Lunch is ready.”
She groaned and hugged the pillow tighter. “Not hungry.”
“But the baby might be.” Adam chuckled. She felt the bed dip down as he sat next to her. She felt his hands caressing her hair and she let out a contented sigh. She opened one eye and gave him a grumpy look. “I’m tired.”