I closed my eyes and thought about Blaine and how he had such a charming smile. I let my mind wander to the day we walked on the beach, hand in hand. I thought about the first time I heard him tell me that he loved me, and the feeling I felt inside when those words came out of him. There was nothing in the world I wanted more than to be in his arms. Well, that was a lie. I wanted him to be safe more than anything. So, I sat there accepting the fate that had befallen me, blocking out the pain and feelings of my physical body. I turned my focus inward. I thought about being a child and playing sports with my father in the front yard. I thought about the friends I had at school and all the students that loved me so much. I let my wander to each and every happy moment in my life, knowing that from that moment on, there would be no more. I knew that I was going to die, and before I d
ied, I would suffer unimaginable pain, but it was okay because my family gave me the strength to close my eyes and block it all out.
When my thoughts turned back to Blaine, all I could think about was how grateful I was that he would get to move on from this. I was grateful that he’d realized his dreams and that he was determined to follow them, and not for me, but for his own self-interest. I was thankful for the time that I got to spend with him, and how I had, for the first time in my life, and the last time, found out what true love was really like.
Chapter 31
Blaine
I sat in the van parked around the corner, watching as they taped the wire to my chest. My nerves were going crazy, but I had to keep my wits about me. I was determined to get Josie out of that place, no matter what it took, even if it was my life. She had obviously left to go turn herself into the cops to keep me safe, but in the process, she’d gotten herself kidnapped by the mob. I knew she had to be terrified, so I had to be strong for her.
I got out of the van and walked down the street to the deli, breathing deeply as I opened the door and walked inside. The guy behind the counter nodded at me as I walked over to the counter and put my hands down.
“I want to talk with Paulie,” I said quietly.
The man stood there, shifting uncomfortably and saying nothing back to me. I was irritated by his refusal to answer me. I clenched my fists and pounded them on the counter.
“Did you hear me?” I clenched my jaw and stared at the man, watching his hands to make sure he didn’t pull a gun. “I have some information about a murder that Paulie was involved in, and I want to talk to him right now. I am not going to move from this spot until I get to see him.”
I stood there staring at the man as he looked me up and down. He looked pretty pissed that I was talking about Paulie in front of the people eating in the deli. He took in a deep breath and cocked his head back, trying to look intimidating. There was nothing intimidating to me about a middle-aged man in an apron covered in pigs’ blood, and I couldn’t help but think about how well the movies got these mobsters right. But it wasn’t the fifties anymore, and I wasn’t afraid of these douche bags.
“You need to get moving,” he said, sniffling. “Or I’m calling the cops.”
I slowly cracked a smile and started to laugh, hoping this guy saw my craziness as something not to mess with. I tapped my finger on the counter and shook my head, still laughing to myself.
“Oh yeah?” I said. “You’re going to call the cops?”
“Yeah,” he said with a growl in his voice.
“Good,” I whispered. “I can give them the evidence I brought with me. Wouldn’t you the love to be the douche bag that got Paulie locked up for murder? That might not sit too well with his father.”
I cracked my neck, and even though I looked calm and collected on the outside, I was terrified on the inside. I was terrified I would get killed before even getting back there. I was terrified that Josie was already dead, and I was terrified that maybe I did actually have the wrong place.
“Wait here,” he grumbled.
I watched as he shuffled to the back, presumably to fetch Paulie. I looked over at the guys eating in the deli and noticed that every single one of them had a gun on their hip. They nodded their head at me but kept a close watch, knowing I wasn’t one of them. I heard footsteps and expected to see Paulie, but instead, a large woman whose face matched the mugshot of Harry the Hammer came rushing from the back, holding her gun straight at my face. I put my hands up in the air and groaned as she grabbed my arm and dragged me to the back.
As soon as we were in the back of the store, Harry pushed me in front of her and shoved her gun into my back. The guys working in the back looked over at us and stared as we moved through the kitchen area and into an office. Straight in front of us was a gray door that looked like an old meat locker. She grabbed my arm and shoved me to the side, pointing the gun at my face. I looked over at the empty desk and realized there were no computers or filing cabinets. This was nothing but a front for the mob, and it was so obvious. Harry stepped up to the door and pounded with her fat fists, a gleaming stream of sweat coming from her brow.
“Fuck off,” a man’s voice shouted from inside.
“Boss,” Harry shouted. “We got company, and you ain’t gonna like it.”
We stood there as I heard shuffling on the other side of the door. Slowly, the doorknob turned and the door flew open. The man I recognized from the FBI photos as Paulie stood there looking at me. Harry grabbed me by the arm and brought me into the doorway. Paulie started laughing, his voice high-pitched and evil.
“Well, well,” he said, rubbing his hands together. “The boyfriend shows up. Won’t you come in?”
Paulie stepped to the side, and I saw Josie strapped to a chair, her head hanging down and blood dripping from her mouth and lip. She tried to pick her head up, but it just fell back down, swaying from side to side. Her blouse was torn open, and there were red marks on her skin. The ropes were tied so tightly around her ankles that skin was turning red and purple. Her hair was matted, half from sweat and tears, the other from blood. It fell loosely around her face. Immediately, my blood began to boil, and I gritted my teeth. Harry lifted the gun to the side of my head and grunted. I was going to kill both of these motherfuckers by the time the night was through, no matter what I had to do. They had hurt Josie, and now all I could see was red.
My first instinct was to punch Paulie, but the cold barrel of a gun kept me from lifting my hands. I tightened my fists at my sides and gritted my teeth, not knowing what to do at that moment. I ran forward toward Josie, but before I could get there, Harry pistol-whipped me in the back of the head, sending me down onto my knees. My head throbbed, and I felt Paulie lean down and grab me by the hair.
“I was just in the process of feeling her up,” Paulie said, laughing. “But hey, I like an audience. You can fucking watch.”
He threw my head back down, and I lifted it toward him, gritting my teeth. I stared at him for several moments, picturing myself strangling him where he was standing. He snapped his fingers in front of my face and laughed, walking back over to Josie and stroking her hair.
“I’m going to fucking kill you,” I said.
“Sure,” he replied sarcastically. “You know, I’m thinking it’s actually going to be the other way around. In fact, you can now be a part of the murder-suicide that I’m planning. The two lovers are racked with guilt over the murder that the boyfriend, that’s you, set up, and Josie carried out. It’s all very romantic. You can both write suicide letters, and when they find the bodies, you can be the one holding the gun. Don’t you think that’s sweet? You put her out of her misery and guilt.”