‘While we’re on the subject, Darlene,’ he began, ‘I have a bit of a confession of my own.’
‘Really?’
‘But you have to try not to think less of me. It sort of happened accidentally on purpose, if you take my meaning.’
‘Not really. It’s too dark in here for you to have filmed us so what can you possibly mean?’
‘Damn, I didn’t think of that,’ he replied. ‘No, I’m referring to when we met at your house the other day.’
‘As you said, it wasn’t really possible to talk at the time.’
‘That’s right, but I must confess, I sort of stepped into your bedroom.’
‘You sort of stepped into my bedroom?’
‘Well, alright! I did go in there.’
‘You didn’t have time to be trying on my dresses.’
‘To explain myself, I was looking for advice of some kind.’
‘From the imaginary gnome who lives in the cupboard?’
‘He was no use. No, what I mean is I was looking for inspiration… a context of some kind. You know, so I could make a connection with you.’
‘It seems to have worked. So, what was it?’
‘I was being a bit of a chancer, I admit,’ he said, now making it all up, ‘but I thought that if you had a poster of a band, or a book we’d both read it would make for a good conversation starter. I guess I was trying too hard; you’re not furious I hope?’
‘I should be – but no,’ she replied. ‘Truth is the idea excites me; I’d like to take you into my bedroom, Kurt. Getting around my parents’ scruples in that way might never be possible though.’
‘Yeah, I sort of got that impression,’ he said, with a wry smile.
‘So did you get your inspiration?’
‘That’s where the awkward question comes in.’
‘Why’s that? Kurt tell the truth now, were you going through my underwear draw?’ she asked, amusing him in that she was talking to him like he was a naughty child.
‘Not guilty, Judge!’ he replied. ‘The thing is – and this is not my fault – but your handbag looked like it had fallen open.’
‘Oh, is that all you’re talking about, sanitary towels?’
‘Erm, no!’
‘What then?’
‘Darlene, there was definitely something hanging out that looked to me very much like a nipple tassel.’
She could have gotten away with the fiendish truth then, had she simply shrugged and said something like ‘That’s just a joke birthday present from a friend’. But Darlene did not do that. Instead she put her hand up to her mouth in a desperate attempt to cover something up (even though the rest of her body had nothing on).
What followed would lead to Darlene blushing again. Not because she was naked or had just made love properly for the first time. Supposedly that’s when it becomes difficult to blush even more, but she knew that Kurt was on to her and was simply not as good as him at fibbing.
The first certainty that Kurt got out of her was that the tassel was there for a purpose. It was not a joke present or something accidentally acquired, though getting her to elaborate and assuage his curiosity proved challenging. She clammed up, not from trying to deceive him but through being embarrassed by the truth.
In the end, it was only through revealing a few fetishes of his own that he was able to coax it out of her.
‘I’m a leg man, with a thing for Sharon Stone,’ he admitted. ‘Plus, I don’t know why, but I’ve always had a desire to make love in a hot air balloon.’