I frowned – both Rebecca and Brian had completely forgotten about me.
“Oh, gosh, sorry,” Rebecca said. “This is Molly.”
“Hi, Molly,” Brian said. He gave me a friendly smile – not like how he was leering at Rebecca. “Nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you,” I said in a voice barely above a whisper. God, I’m so stupid, I thought angrily. I can’t even talk to a regular guy without going to pieces!
Rebecca eyed me. “Brian, it was nice to meet you, but Molly and I were in the middle of something important,” she said. “Maybe later.”
Brian nodded. I could tell he was surprised – he was suave and handsome, not the kind of guy who’d normally go after Rebecca. I frowned again. What was it with men? Did they just want sex, from anyone who looked even remotely available?
“Sorry about that,” Rebecca said. She rolled her eyes.
“No, it’s okay,” I said slowly. “What were you talking about before? You know? The benefits thing?”
Rebecca drained the last of her wine and set the glass on the bar with more force than necessary. “It’s just…like platonic, you know? Except you have sex, too.”
“Like in Pretty Woman? You don’t kiss on the mouth?”
Rebecca laughed, then covered her mouth with both hands and gave me a guilty look. “Molly, no, not like that at all,” she said. “You could kiss, I mean, you could do whatever you want. You’re not in a relationship, so it’s not like you have any claim to the person you’re sleeping with.”
I frowned. “I don’t know, Rebecca. I…I want a boyfriend. I don’t just want sex.”
Rebecca shrugged. “Maybe it was a dumb suggestion,” she said. She made a face, wrinkling her forehead and frowning deeply.
“No, it’s not that,” I said. “I just…I don’t know. I think I’m too traditional.”
Rebecca swallowed, looking deeply uncomfortable.
“What?”
“Nothing.” Rebecca shook her head. “Forget it.”
“No, you have to tell me,” I said. “Come on, I tell you everything.” Well, almost everything, I added silently.
“Well, it’s just…” Rebecca trailed off. Her voice was full of nerves.
“What?” My palms were sweating and I wiped them on my thighs. “Rebecca, come on!”
Rebecca looked deeply uncomfortable. “It’s just that my brother, well, he sleeps with everything,” she said. “And maybe…I don’t know, he could teach you a few things.”
My jaw dropped. “What?”
“I know, I know, he’s a disgusting individual and an awful person…but he has no problem just sleeping with someone and leaving it at that,” Rebecca said. “God, I feel like a bad friend just for bringing it up.”
“Well…I’m just surprised,” I said, frowning. “I mean, you hate him!”
“I do,” Rebecca said. “But I also know that you’re lonely, and I know that you don’t want to be a virgin anymore.” I glared at her and she blushed before continuing: “Look, I’m sorry. I am, Molly. But…I don’t know, maybe don’t you think it wouldn’t be better for you to have some experience? Then you’ll probably be more confident, and guys would be way more attracted to you.”
“Guys aren’t attracted to me because I’m not confident,” I said hotly. “They’re not attracted to me because I’m fat!”
“That’s bull and you know it,” Rebecca said, narrowing her eyes. “I can think of at least five people bigger than you who are in happy relationships! Look, if Amy Schumer has a boyfriend, why not you?”
I frowned. “I don’t know,” I said. “It all seems kind of slutty, don’t you think?”
“Don’t be outdated,” Rebecca said. She wrinkled her nose. “I had no idea you were such a prude!”
“I’m not,” I said, offended. “I just don’t know if it’s for me. And god, you can’t say anything about this to Alex!”