"He is not as bad as you think, not once you come to know him. He is reserved, true, and certainly a bit arrogant. And he likes having his way. But what lord does not? I believe I can manage him."
Reaching out earnestly, Aurora took her hand. "Raven, I understand this desire of yours to marry a title – you feel you must fulfill your mother's wishes. But I cannot help believing you would be far happier if you were to marry for love."
Just as earnestly, Raven leaned forward. "Do you love Lord March?"
"Yes, of course I do. I have loved him all my life."
"And do you love Nicholas?"
Aurora looked away, not wanting to face the answer to that question. Her love for Geoffrey had been sweet and tender, not this anguished yearning. What she felt for Nicholas was so complex… so disturbing… so painful…
"I know I am not experienced in matters of the heart," Raven said, "but I can't believe you are indifferent to my brother. I've seen the way you look at him. If that isn't love, then what is it?"
Passion, Aurora wanted to reply – yet even as she had the thought, Desiree's observation in the journal came back to her with poignant force. Passion of the flesh can beget passion of the heart. I am living proof…
Passion could lead to love, Aurora acknowledge
d despairingly. It had happened to Desiree. It had happened to her as well.
The ache in her heart welled up to clutch at her throat. She had trouble speaking when she replied, "Whatever I feel for Nicholas cannot be allowed to matter."
Impatiently Raven rose from her chair and began to pace the room. "What does Lord March think of all this? Does the man have no heart? How could he demand such a sacrifice from you?"
"He doesn't know about my relationship with Nicholas. Yesterday I told him only that I'd heard my husband was still alive."
Turning, Raven stared. "He doesn't know Nick is here in England?"
"I… I couldn't tell him. I couldn't deliver that kind of blow. And I was afraid of exposing Nicholas. I thought it better to wait until he was safely away."
"Forgive me for such bluntness, Aurora, but the Earl of March may not want a wife who has had a marriage annulled. He may not want to bring such a stain to his family name."
"Geoffrey isn't concerned about his family consequence. He's only determined to shield me from scandal. He is the one who proposed helping me gain an annulment. He wants me to have the protection of his name once I sever my marriage to a criminal."
"But if you tell him how you feel, that Nicholas is no criminal…"
Aurora squeezed her eyes shut, struggling against the rising anguish inside her. She couldn't tell Geoffrey that she loved another man. She couldn't hurt him that way. If he desired her for his wife, then she had no choice but to honor his wishes. She owed him that much loyalty.
"Shouldn't he be allowed to decide for himself?" Raven asked. "You should tell him the truth, Aurora. At least about your relationship with Nicholas. It would be unfair not to. And it could make all the difference."
"I cannot tell him anything," Aurora whispered. "Not until Nicholas is gone."
"But by then it may be too late! Aurora, don't you see – "
Another polite rap sounded on the door, causing Raven to break off her impassioned plea.
When wearily Aurora bid entrance, the door opened a crack to reveal Danby's grave face. "There is a gentleman to see you, my lady. A Captain Richard Gerrod. He says it is urgent that he speak to you about your husband."
Aurora felt the color drain from her face. Dear God.
Captain Gerrod was the naval officer who had apprehended Nicholas in the Caribbean. By now he would know his former prisoner was still alive. Did he realize Nicholas was in England? But why else would Gerrod have come to call on her if not to seek out Nicholas?
For the space of a dozen heartbeats, Aurora could not make a sound. It was left to Raven to answer Danby.
"Please tell the captain her ladyship will be down in a moment."
"As you wish," the elderly butler responded before withdrawing.
Still in shock, Aurora turned to stare at Raven. The younger woman looked pale and only marginally more composed than Aurora herself felt.