“We’re getting married, Astor,” I say. “Enough of the lies, the subterfuge, the hiding. Your dad is unhappy, but he will come around, and even if he doesn’t, we can’t go on like this.”
“I know.” She swallows hard. Her lower lip trembles, and my hard heart breaks in two.
I catch her thin body up against mine and shove her head against my chest. “I’m here, Astor, and I’m never going to leave you alone again. You’re going to have to scrape me off with a knife—that’s how attached I will be to you.”
“That sounds painful.”
“Yeah, which is why we aren’t being separated again. I love you, Astor, and love means making sure that you’re happy. The only tears you should be crying are ones of joy when I get you a diamond bigger than a golf ball.”
“I don’t think I could wear a rock like that.”
“Don’t know if you don’t try.”
She giggles against my chest, and the heaviness starts to ease. “We’re going to be okay,” I assure her, and for the first time in a long time, I actually believe it.
CHAPTER 20
ASTOR
As I lean into Cane, the weight of the world starts to lift. It’s not because of his words completely. I’m letting go.
I always knew if I let Cane, he’d take on every struggle I have, but what I needed was to truly believe he was never going anywhere. That I could freely let myself fall into him and know without a doubt he’d catch me.
I think on some level I’ve always known that, but my fractured heart and some of my ego was taking a bit of time to heal. But I made a promise to myself that I wasn’t going to be like my father and hold on to that crap anymore. I wasn’t going to let anything get in my way of finding true happiness. Not myself and definitely not my father.
Even all those years ago when Cane pushed me away, he’d done it because he thought he was protecting me. He never tried to move on with someone else. Some of his uncles had done that when their wives died.
Birdie’s mom is a prime example of that. They found women they knew they’d never love, thinking it protected them from the curse. But Cane had never moved on. He waited all these years. Doing things for me each step of the way to try to make my life easier. He decided long ago that it was me for him or no one.
“Take me back to your place, cowboy.” I smirk.
Cane doesn’t have to be asked twice. In no time he has me in his truck headed toward the Justice ranch. It takes everything in me not to tell him I’m knocked up, but I think it’s better if we’re not in a moving vehicle when I break the news.
“I’ve been making plans to fix up your place, but if your father digs his heels in, we can see about living somewhere else. I know how much you love that house and how it holds a ton of memories of your mom. I was hoping we could raise our family there one day. I think I set your father straight, but you Callaways can be stubborn.”
I didn’t think I could love Cane anymore, but he just proved me wrong. Tears prick my eyes at how thoughtful he is when it comes to me. I shouldn’t be surprised; he always has my best interests at heart. He’s making it damn hard not to blurt out that this family he has in mind is already in the making.
“How did that go? Setting my father straight?” I knew it was only a matter of time before Cane broke and went over there.
“I know you’ve wanted to wait—”
“Done waiting, and I’m sorry I made us wait this long.”
“Don’t. I fucked up first.”
“How about we both take some of that,” I compromise. “Now what did he do to cross this line?” I ask. Cane shifts in his seat, his eyes staying on the road. “Out with it, cowboy.” With how he’s holding it back, I know it’s going to be something that’s going to hurt my heart, but I need to hear it.
“It doesn’t really matter because it was never going to fucking happen. You’re mine, Astor Callaway. No one else will ever call you their wife or the mother of their children.”
“I have a feeling I’m about to be real mad, but it’s damn hot when you get all worked up over me only belonging to you,” I admit, licking my lips. “But you’re right. You’re the only man on this earth I’ll ever let manhandle me.”
“Cause it turns you on when I do it.”
“Whatever,” I mutter, fighting a smile. “Now out with it,” I order. Cane gives me the whole story. “A cow!” I shout.