Especially in moments like that one when I had to stand at a table full of people who were just passing through town and listen to them making nitpicking complaints with a smile on my face.
I was seriously considering working for Carter. It wasn’t just that I was quickly losing my ability to force that smile onto my face and keep up the act while managing the diner or even during my shifts waiting tables.
He had really gotten me when he said I would get to hang out with him all day, which actually could be the best part of the deal.
But even as I thought about that, my brain felt like it was spinning. I couldn’t tell how Carter felt about me. When he asked me to go to dinner with him after rescuing me from Ashton in the parking lot, I wanted to think of it as a spontaneous date. But he didn’t say anything to confirm that, and we didn’t kiss when he dropped me off at my apartment after we had dinner. That made me question if he really did like me or if I had completely misread the entire situation.
The dinner itself was amazing, as far as I could tell. We had a wonderful time talking and laughing at the restaurant long after we finished eating. And yet, that didn’t necessarily mean it was a date. It really could have just been a friend looking out for me. Carter knew how close I was to both Harleigh and Desiree, and he was good friends with their husbands.
By extension, I was someone he felt protective of, and that might have been all there was to it. He knew I was dealing with drama with my ex, but also that I was looking for another job. He was able to offer help on both fronts, so he did.
But it seemed as soon as I convinced myself that was all it was, my mind drifted back to our dinner together, and I saw it in a different light. Throughout the entire evening, we flirted heavily and took as many opportunities as we could to sneak little touches. There was nothing significant or overtly sexual, but we brushed hands, nudged feet under the table, and even squeezed into the same side of the booth for a while to listen to the live music playing.
That brought me right back to being confused. I couldn’t remember the last time I enjoyed spending time with a guy the way I had with Carter, and all night I felt butterflies in my stomach. There were plenty of moments when I thought I saw the same kind of flicker of interest and excitement in his eyes, but I couldn’t be sure.
I wanted to talk to Harleigh and Desiree about it, but I was still hesitant. They were my best friends, and I knew they wanted what was best for me. It wasn’t like they would purposefully hurt my feelings or make me uncomfortable. But they had the tendency to tease and poke fun at me or try to interject themselves. That wasn’t what I needed at that moment.
Rebecca came around the corner and dropped some dirty dishes into the dishwasher tub. She went to the line to start putting together a basket of bread to go with that day’s special, then glanced over like it was the first time she noticed I was standing there.
“Hey,” she said. “Everything okay?”
I started to tell her everything was fine and leave the kitchen, but I stopped.
“Can I run something by you really fast?” I asked.
She shrugged and nodded. “Sure.”
“So, I know this sounds completely ridiculous and like I’ve gone back in time to my junior high school days or something, but I don’t know how to tell if a guy likes me.”
She lifted an eyebrow at me. “What guy?”
“Carter,” I said. “We ran into each other the other day, and he spontaneously asked me if I wanted to go to dinner with him. It wasn’t like it was planned or anything, and he didn’t say go out on a date. He just asked if I wanted to get some dinner. We had a really good time. We were super flirty. It seemed like everything was going well, and it felt like a date. But at the end of the night, he didn’t kiss me. So, now I’m kind of confused.”
I purposely left out the part about Ashton, not wanting to complicate the situation anymore.
I was a little bit embarrassed to have opened up to her like that. I almost wished I hadn’t. But she didn’t laugh or make fun of me. Instead, she paused and seemed to think through what I just said.
“And you said that the two of you were flirting throughout dinner?” she asked.
“Yes,” I said. “We were there for a few hours. I wasn’t like we just got something quick to eat and then went our separate ways. We sat there and talked and shared stories. We were laughing and kind of finding different ways to touch each other. There was live music, and we sat so close together. I mean—I feel like those things mean something, but I don’t really know. It’s been a long time since I had a first date with anybody. Or even a crush on anybody. I think I might have forgotten how.”