He was standing against the wall next to Justin, the two of them almost shoulder to shoulder. His face was completely blank, intentionally so, and I hated that look on him. He was angry, probably furious, but he was hiding it away. I’d seen it on him before, but it’d never been directed toward me. It hurt even more than I thought it would. I couldn’t stand the sight of it, so I looked back down. I felt smaller than ever before. It was nobody’s fault but my own. I had made these choices. Now I would have to accept the consequences.
“We think we know what Myrin’s after,” I said slowly.
“What?” Ryan said. “How the hell did you—” He laughed bitterly. “Of course you do. It was that day in Mama’s office, wasn’t it? When I came in upon you and Randall and Morgan. I asked you—” He cut himself off.
“What does he want?” Gary asked, and I hated the fear I heard in his voice.
“Me.”
“I thought that much was obvious,” Justin pointed out.
“Yeah, maybe. But it’s not just that. It’s… when he came to Mashallaha, he— It happened quickly, probably even more than I remember. One moment I was sleeping, and the next I heard his voice and he was calling to me.”
“Like dragons?” Tiggy asked.
“Sort of. I guess. With the dragons, it’s always… bright. Like little suns burning inside my head. With him, it was shadow. It was dark, and I could feel it pulling on me. Calling me toward him.”
“And you went,” Ryan said. He was angry. That much I understood at least. “You went.”
My hackles started to rise. I felt cornered. “I had to,” I snapped at him. “He was there because of me. What if he’d hurt the gypsies? They were innocent. I couldn’t take the chance of them getting hurt.”
“But you didn’t trust me enough to take me with you,” Ryan said. “You just left me there knowing what you were walking into.”
“Of course I trust you. I didn’t want you to get hurt!”
“Then you didn’t trust me to take care of myself,” he retorted. “And that’s just as—”
“Ryan,” Justin said softly, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Now’s maybe not the time for this. Let him finish, okay? We’ve got to get this all out now.”
And wonder of all wonders, Ryan deflated under Justin’s touch. My insides were hot and oily at the sight of the Prince being able to rein in Ryan’s anger so easily. The last few weeks had obviously brought them closer together, and didn’t that thought just burn a little.
“Fine,” Ryan said. He didn’t look back up at me.
Justin’s hand slid from his shoulder, but they remained close together. He waited a beat, as if making sure Ryan wouldn’t speak again, before he motioned for me to continue.
“I, uh.” I shook my head, trying to ignore the jealousy curling within me. Justin was right. Now wasn’t the time. “Right. Um. Myrin. He came. He told me that he wasn’t here for the dragons. That he didn’t care about them. He was after something else.”
“And you believed him?” Gary asked, confused. “Why would you find truth in anything that he’d say? Of course he would tell you that. He’s just trying to distract you.”
“That’s what I thought,” I said. “At first. But….”
“The scars,” Tiggy said. “Sam go boom. Like sand mermaids. But no scars then.”
“Sam go boom,” I echoed.
“Scars?” Justin asked with a frown.
I winced as I leaned back slightly on the bed, lifting my tunic up. Even with the sling still against my chest, the lightning tree embedded into my skin was painfully clear.
“My gods,” Justin whispered. “Myrin did that?”
I dropped my tunic back down, not wanting to be on display anymore. “Yes. And no. I… went boom.”
“But you didn’t get those with the sand mermaids,” Ryan said. “Those were only with Myrin. You said you thought it was just his magic and yours that caused it.”
“That’s what I thought.”
“But?” Gary asked quietly.