Into This River I Drown - Page 126

hand to his face and inhales the scent. It hurts my heart to see, though I can’t say

why.

“I was not the first angel,” he says as he rubs the pitch against his slacks, “but I

was one of the Firsts. Do you understand?”

“Yeah. I think so. Metatron was first, right?”

Michael stops and squats on his heels, rubbing his fingers along the grass. “Yes.

I must admit to being surprised that you know that name.”

“Cal mentioned it once. Said no one had seen him for a long time.” “Longer than you could possibly imagine,” Michael says, picking a pinecone off

the ground and rolling it in his hands. “But that is beside the point. When I was much

younger than I am now, I felt I had to compete with my brothers for my Father’s

affections. I was one of the Firsts, which meant I had brothers to compete with, or so

I thought. Things were much different then. We were young. Cocky. We thought we

could do it all, or at least my brothers and I did. Father was strict in his rules, and we

acted out as much as possible, specifically because a time came when it appeared he

loved his humans more than he loved us. That was not the case, of course, but we

were his sons and we worshipped the ground he walked on, so it was easy to get

jealous. Metatron above everyone else, though. There’s something about being the

actual first. In essence, he was the only because he was the first. Gabriel, David,

Raphael, and I couldn’t help but feel inferior to Metatron, who seemed to have

Fat

her’s favor above the rest of ours, seemed to have his ear more than the rest of us.

But then Metatron was gone.”

“Where did he go?” I can’t help but ask. I am unsure what this has to do with

me, but it seems important that I listen. “Did he fall?”

“It would seem so,” Michael says as he stands. “No one really knows for sure

how or why, and Father would not say. If I had to guess, I would say he was cast

out.”

I feel cold. “Is that what happened to Cal?” I whisper.

Michael looks at me sharply. “No. And please don’t misinterpret what I am

saying as that. No, Calliel is… something else entirely. He is no longer part of a

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