Baby, Please (OHellNo) - Page 27

Nope. He was not coming for seconds.

“Hey, um,” he said. “I just want to apologize for the other night. I shouldn’t have let it go that far. I’m really not in a position to date anyone right now. But I didn’t want it to be awkward when we see each other around the complex.”

I agreed because what else could I do as his words crushed all hope from my soul? He was the first guy I ever really liked.

“Sure. Yeah. Cool. I run track, so I totally get it. Sports come first,” I lied. That philosophy was the old me. After my major burnout from training for the Olympics, I had a coming to Jesus. Success is nothing if you’re killing yourself to win. I’d been out of control, and I was never going back.

Something clicked with Dean, though. I was willing to fake how I felt to get more of it. “I’m glad you get it. Not many people do,” he said.

After that, two things happened: One, he started popping by to vent about some game he’d screwed up. Honestly, I saw a few news articles, but the “career hara-kiri” he claimed to have committed wasn’t so obvious to me.

One bad game. Big fucking whoop.

Pro teams invest in stats. They invest in potential, demonstrated by year over year improvement. For example, I can’t walk onto a football field, kick a goal, and get drafted by the NFL. Athletes have to show what they’re made of, and sometimes what the scouts love most is seeing how a player bounces back. Because, let’s face it, we all screw up. All players have horrible games or seasons. The pro scouts want to see how quickly and successfully the person picks themselves up and gets back to business. But that’s Dean’s downfall. He’s a perfectionist, in it to win it.

All he needs is the right woman by his side to help him realize his potential and not sweat the bumps in the road. He needs me.

As for point number two, I got to thinking how most guys would never come to your door and tell you to your face that a hookup was just a onetime thing due to life’s circumstances.

But that’s when I really fell for him. He’s honest.

Dean is also hardworking, smart, really intense, and kind. But he’s incredibly tough on himself. Every mistake, every second he doesn’t spend pushing himself is a failure in his eyes.

So here I’ve been, being the patient friend and sounding board for his career. I figured if I just hung in there, he’d eventually see how much we have in common, that we could be a great team.

Then this baby comes along.

What the fuck? A baby, Dean? Dude, you have a future. I have plans. She is not a part of it.

Of course, I can’t say that to his face without coming across as a coldhearted bitch, so my only move is to continue being the steadfast friend. His loyal woman “friend.” The one he leans on for advice.

If I play my cards right, I’ll make him see that he’s got a big bright future. With me. The two of us—not three—conquering the world.

So who the hell is this Lara chick?

Well, luckily for him, I’m also in it to win it. I’m not about to let almost a year of time invested go down the drain for a baby and some dumb slut from his work.

Game on, honey.

DANNIE

My friend Quincy and I are sitting on the red couch in my living room, celebrating with skinny margaritas.

“I can’t believe Dean Norland took our free daycare offer!” I squeal. We just opened our flagship daycare facility five months ago. It’s bursting at the seams, and a second location is already in the works. The idea is to target young, successful, single parents who fall into the extreme-workaholic category. We plan to expand into three more states by the end of next year. After that, franchising. That’s where the money is.

My goal is for Green Babies to be the McDonald’s of daycare. If McDonald’s had no carbon footprint and cost thirty bucks an hour. Cha-ching! Parents will get uniform quality no matter which facility they bring their kids to. No need to screen, interview, or waste time getting recommendations from friends on where the best places in town are.

Why?

Because we do all the work.

Every employee will have the same training, background check, and unreactive temperament—certified by a DNA test to screen out those with an undesirable genetic history. Anyone who’s into privacy need not apply.

Every location will use our environmentally friendly products and have the same sanitation protocols, along with a low child-to-adult ratio. All sites will come equipped with a 360-degree video feed in every room so parents can check in on their kids at any time. We’ll also provide a holographic chat station so parents can remotely interact with their offspring during those long twelve-hour days at the office. Or the herbal enema spa. Or the psychedelic mushroom retreat in the Amazon jungle—a must for the young entrepreneur.

Tags: Mimi Jean Pamfiloff Romance
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