“We’re back on the shore now,” she said quietly. “Watching the sunset again.”
His hand came up to cradle her jaw. He whisked his thumb across her cheek. “Sunrise. Sunset. They’re all good, as long as you’re here.”
Mari distantly wondered if her throat would ever stop aching. Lately it seemed to be constantly swelling with emotion. “It’s been a difficult trip…coming back to Harbor Town,” she murmured.
“Mari, about what Colleen said in the hospital…I know it upset you. But Colleen was worried—”
“I know,” Mari said rapidly. She turned toward the lake, missing Marc’s caress when her motion caused his hand to fall away. “Of course she was upset. I would have been, too, given the circumstances. It’s completely natural.”
Out of the corner of her vision, she saw Marc stiffen. “So why have you been avoiding me for the past few days?”
“I needed to think,” Mari said, her gaze on the dancing waves of the silver-blue lake.
He didn’t speak for several seconds. When she glanced over at him, she saw his mouth had drawn into a straight line. She’d never seen Marc look so grim. Somehow he’d guessed what she was about to say.
“Don’t do this, Mari.”
“One of us has to,” she said in a hushed voice. “I was right. It would never work, you and me.”
“It does work,” he said, putting his hand on her upper arm. “It always has!”
“For us,” Mari replied, just as heatedly. “It works for us, Marc. But we’re not the only two people on the planet. There are other people…other lives we have to take into account.”
“I don’t accept that. We’re not hurting anyone by being together. What happened with my mother was scary for everyone, but that had nothing to do with you starting The Family Center or us being together. It had everything to do with the fact that she’s been ignoring her physical health. I’ve had a long conversation with her about it. She’s agreed to take her medication now and follow the doctor’s treatment advice.”
“I spoke with Brigit, as well.”
He paused for two heartbeats. “You did? About what?” he asked warily.
“She seems to be of the opinion that you want me this much because I was the one thing you never could have.”
“And you believed her?” Marc asked, anger entering his tone.
“No…at least not totally.”
“What’s that supposed to mean? Not totally?”
She paused for a moment, gathering herself. She waved toward the edge of the dune in the distance.
“Do you remember us standing there on the end of this dune together? It would have been fifteen summers ago. Just weeks before the crash, if I’m not mistaken.”
He didn’t respond to her quiet question, but she sensed the tension coiling in his muscles.
“I was terrified,” she said softly. “Literally. I still have a fear of heights, you know. But I jumped. Do you know why?”
She turned to look at him, but he still didn’t speak. She hated seeing the rigid, hard lines of his face cast in the crimson rays of the dying sun. His eyes were usually so alive when he looked at her, but at that moment, they looked cold with dread.
“Because, once upon a time, I would have followed Marc Kavanaugh anywhere. Anywhere,” she added fervently. She shook her head sadly. “But things changed. And I’m not a child anymore. I have others to consider.”
“I see. We’re back to this, then. I’m the selfish one, for suggesting we should be together.”
Mari closed her eyes and felt tears skitter down her cheek. The wind increased and tossed the trees behind them. The waves hitting the sand beach in the distance sounded lonely. She pushed her blowing hair off her damp face.
“I don’t think that anymore. You’re not selfish. You’re strong. Stronger than I am. You said you would accept my decision after we returned from Chicago.” She swallowed convulsively. “Please understand. I’m not strong enough to follow you this time around.”
She turned away from the lake and paused. “Ryan and I booked flights back home. We leave tomorrow. I can finish what remains to be done for The Family Center from there. I’ll go inside now and tie up a few loose ends. Ryan can pick me up here later.” She lowered her head, praying for strength to continue. “There’s…there’s something I’ll need to speak with you about, but…perhaps it’d be best if it waited until I was in San Francisco.”
She glanced up at him. This was by far the hardest thing she’d ever done. Her entire body hurt as if every cell protested at the idea of leaving him. She touched her stomach in an instinctive protective gesture. This life was the one that had decided her, in the end. She needed to protect her child from the pain and heartache of their past. Wasn’t fate screaming loud and clear that they weren’t meant to be together? How many more people would be hurt if they tried?