When I’m back out, I reach for my purse and take it back into the bathroom, ignoring that his eyes are on me. I feel them, like the gaze contains heat.
I quickly wash my face, brush my teeth, and take my birth control pill.
I breeze back, ignoring him, and find Cat and Bailey in the bedroom. The bed is made. Cat is sitting on the end of it. Bailey is sitting in the chair.
“Thank you,” I say and reach for the coffee and take a sip.
It’s still hot and it’s French vanilla. Cat is so thoughtful.
She’s looking at me with agony on her face. “You’re still not okay,” she says.
I shake my head. “How can I be? After everything he did, he kidnaps me and brings me back here?” My chin trembles.
I try hard to stop the tears from coming again. I’ve cried so much in the past two days, I’m just sick of it. I feel like all my energy got used up to go to the bathroom and come back so I plop onto the bed beside her.
“I appreciate that you both came over to check on things,” I muster up all I can to get loud so I’m certain he hears, “but things aren’t okay and they’re not gonna be. I don’t want to be here, but he decided to take my choices away. Again. And I really don’t feel like talking. I’m sorry, but if you can just---”
“What happened was awful, Ivy. Just awful,” Cat says. She’s fingering the quilt on the bed.
Bailey is staring at her feet. Her face says it all; she still agrees with my decision to go.
I want them to leave. I can’t take their kindness right now.
“I think I know that. I was there. It happened to me.”
Cat’s face falls.
“I don’t wanna hurt your feelings, guys, but nothing you can say right now will erase what he did to me. In front of everyone. You said yourself that your husband, a man in the same position never did that to you. I can tell by Bailey’s reaction that she never saw something like that. And she’s the self-proclaimed walking werewolf encyclopedia.”
“I never claimed to know everything,” Bailey says. “But I do know that he didn’t do that intentionally. He’s a wreck. I’m pissed, too, Ivy, on your behalf, but your mate is shredded over what happened.”
I swallow. That doesn’t bring me joy. That doesn’t feel like sweet justice. All of this just hurts.
“Something is just very wrong with Mason,” Bailey says, “And this was a chain reaction. Add to that, Tyson doesn’t function like a typical alpha or a typical man for that matter. He’s, for lack of a better term, a super alpha and super dysfunctional because he a) grew up outside the pack with a mental case for a guardian and his only company and b) he spent six years in the forest in wolf form. If he’d spent one more season as a wolf, he’d never have come back to us. Six years is sketchy enough. Seven is the absolute limit and he got awful close to that limit. I’m not saying those are valid excuses, but they’re reasons that should be taken into account.”
I shrug. “I’m not trying to be heartless, but none of this is an Ivy problem. It’s a Tyson problem. I didn’t ask to be here; I don’t want to be here.”
I’m trying to say all this with a calm and detached manner but of course I’m failing. I’m not calm. I’m broken. I wish I could be detached. But all of this feels very, very attached to every part of me.
“And no matter what, you guys, you don’t have to worry about me telling anybody any of your secrets, so –”
“Ivy,” Cat tries, reaching out and grabbing my hand. “Mason –”
“Regardless of what is or isn’t wrong with Mason –” I hear Ty growling from the other room and get a full-body shudder “That was done to me. Me.” I flatten my palm on my chest. My sore, empty chest.
Ty is suddenly in the room with us and he looks furious.
“I never want his name on your lips again, Ivy. Never!”
My mouth drops open. My stomach pitches. I don’t like the look in his eyes. At all.
“Out, women. Now.”
“Son…” Cat rises and puts her hand on his forearm. “You need to –”
“I tried to stay awake all night and absorb your pain, Ivy, so you wouldn’t feel it. I tried. And I feel bad. I have never felt worse than this. It didn’t work. But you know what? I think I’d do it again. If anyone thinks you’re not mine –”
“Tyson!” Cat calls and I can feel the winces from both her and Bailey.
Ty ignores her.
“Deep down, I know – so I’m telling you I’d do it again, Ivy. I’d fuck you in front of him again if he put his eyes on you. This time, though, I’d kill him while I was doing it. You. Are mine. Mine, Ivy! I’m sorry I hurt you, I am very,” he thumps his chest with a fist “fucking sorry I hurt you. But I won’t lie and say I won’t do it again because you’re mine! Mine to love. Mine to fuck. Mine to protect, and –”