Her heart started racing. Jace must have been injured. That must be why Josh was here with her now. She whispered, “Is Jace okay?”
“Jace is fine. You don’t remember? You ran in front of the snowboarder when he jumped. Do you remember that? And he hit you. Remember?”
Charlie wracked her brain, but the story didn’t seem familiar. “Is the snowboarder okay?”
He dropped her hand and pulled on his hair. “You’re not okay. All right? Everyone else is fine. But you almost died. In fact, you did die—you quit breathing, your heart quit beating, and you lost half of your blood volume. You have broken bones, and you lost your spleen and lacerated your lungs and cut your brachial artery and your descending aorta. And you had surgery, and that’s why you hurt like hell.”
Huge tears welled up in her eyes. Josh was so angry with her. She must have done something really stupid.
“I’m s-sorry.” A sob escaped causing so much agony she cried even more.
Josh grabbed her hand again, squeezing while he pleaded with her, “Please don’t cry. Please. Why are you apologizing?”
“Y-you’re m-mad.”
“I’m not mad, Charlie. Why would I be mad?” He smoothed her hair away from her face with a gentle touch. “You saved Jace’s life, but you almost got yourself killed doing it. I was just afraid.”
She considered his words. Without realizing what would happen, she drew a deep breath. The sharp sensation of a knife tearing through her chest made her cry out again. “My button isn’t working,” she whispered, as she jammed her finger against it repeatedly.
“Your button has a timer, so it won’t let you have another dose for a little while. Is it still hurting?”
Her nod couldn’t express the agony she felt. And why was Josh here instead of her mother? “Where’s Mom?”
Josh let go of her hand and backed away. His face was red and he couldn’t meet her eyes. “Only one of us could spend the night. I thought it should be me.”
“What about Olivia?”
“Olivia is... We’re not getting married.” Josh appeared to be struggling for words. “It never would have lasted, Charlie. We weren’t really in love. I... I probably won’t be able to adopt Chloe if I’m not married. But I can still adopt Jace.”
Finally, Charlie understood what was going on. Olivia didn’t want to marry him. He wanted Charlie to take her place, but he was too embarrassed to ask her. She remembered what her Mom had said about Josh proposing. “He’s much too proud. He would never, ever ask you to do something like that.” He must have mentioned the idea to Brad. Didn’t Josh say Brad told the nurse they were engaged?
And then she knew. She knew what she had to do. She would offer. She loved Jace and Chloe, and she wanted Josh to be their father. Of course, she loved Josh, too. It would be miserable being with him in a fake marriage, knowing he didn’t love her. But surely he would grow to love her if they stayed married long enough, wouldn’t he? Hadn’t her Mom told her it was easy to fall in love with someone who loved your kids?
“Josh...” She struggled to speak, gesturing with her fingers. He took her hand between his and bent close to listen. “I’ll do it... I’ll marry you.”
He stared at her with wide, blinking eyes. He opened his mouth as if to respond, but no words came out.
“But Josh... No divorce. I don’t believe in divorce,” she continued, wincing as she fought to take a breath. “We both love the kids. And I think we could love each other, too. We just have to stay together and work on it.”
Josh didn’t respond. Not one word. He merely gawked at her in stunned silence. As his muteness continued, Charlie felt her cheeks burning. She must have misunderstood. He hadn’t wanted to marry her at all. It was so awkward. She wanted to crawl under the hospital bed and hide, but she couldn’t move.
JOSH’S MIND WAS REELING. Charlie had offered to marry him. It would solve all his problems, wouldn’t it? Except she didn’t love him. She clearly stated she loved the kids, but not him. Still, she was willing to commit to a life-long marriage. She was willing to learn to love him. Should he agree to her proposal? His original plan had been to give up on adopting Chloe, to give up on the idea of a January wedding. He’d planned to take his time and court Charlie. He’d been gathering the courage to tell her he loved her when she’d suddenly proposed. Now what was he supposed to do?
He was jarred from his reverie when he noticed tears tracking down her face. She turned her head away, tugging at her hand, but he gripped it. He had to act fast—he was hurting her feelings with his silence.
“Okay! I mean... Do you really want to? I mean... Will you really marry me? Like next month?”
She turned back to study his face. What was that emotion in her eyes? Regret? Hope? Suspicion?
“No divorce?” Her voice quavered.
“No divorce!” He grinned with excitement, but then he remembered her drugged state. “Are you sure Charlie? You’re on morphine. Maybe you don’t even know what you’re saying.”
“I know exactly what I’m saying. But Josh... One other thing... Please,” she whispered, and he bent closer. “I don’t want anyone to know it’s not a real marriage. Can we pretend we already love each other?”
“No problem.” That was the easiest promise he’d ever made. And he would treat her so well she would fall in love with him soon. Maybe he could get her to fall in love before they even got married. Then they could have a real honeymoon and a real marriage. Yes. This plan would work. He could marry Charlie and adopt Chloe and Jace. He could have it all.
He gave her hand a squeeze, still smiling, when he noticed tears were still rolling down her face.