“What’s the deal with Olivia?” asked Derek. “It was like she was coming on to me.”
“Maybe she’s trying to make Josh jealous. I’m not sure what’s going on, but surely she’ll back off since she’s seen us kissing.”
“I’m perfectly willing for her to use me to make Josh jealous if she wants to. Olivia’s pretty cute, too.”
“Derek!” Charlie scolded in a harsh whisper. “You’d better not make a play for Olivia while you’re on this trip.”
“I’m kidding. I won’t mess up your plan. But seriously, what would you do? Break up with me?”
“I know ways to kill you that are completely undetectable,” she asserted. “I’ve watched a lot of CSI.”
“Maybe. But you’d never get away with it. Your guilt would be written all over your face. You’re pretty bad at hiding your feelings. In fact, your friends may not even buy that we’re dating.”
“Do you really think so?” She wondered how to make her face look more enthusiastic about Derek’s affection.
“I absolutely do,” Derek said. “I could teach you though. You’ll need this kind of training in practice court. You have to keep your emotions hidden.”
“What should I do?”
“Try this. Close your eyes. Good. Now imagine you’re sitting beside some hot movie star.”
“I don’t like any movie stars. They’re all stuck on themselves.”
“Okay fine. Not a movie star. Just a hot guy.”
“What does he look like?”
“It doesn’t matter. As long as you think he’s hot.”
“Well, what does he smell like?”
“Huh?”
“Being hot is not enough—he has to smell nice.”
“He’s hot and he smells great.”
“But does he like the outdoors?”
“Does he need to like the outdoors?”
“Yes.”
“Then he definitely likes the outdoors. He practically lives outdoors. He even works outdoors.”
“If he works outdoors, he probably doesn’t smell nice.” Charlie opened her eyes and grinned at Derek who was clearly frustrated.
He groaned. “You’re kidding me aren’t you?”
“I couldn’t help myself. I’m sorry. I’ll try to be serious.”
“Look, I was simply going to suggest if you imagined I was your dream guy, you wouldn’t look like you were in distress when I kissed you.”
“But I don’t really have a dream guy. And that’s not the problem. I mean, I’d be uncomfortable kissing you in front of other people no matter who you were. Even if you were—” Charlie stopped abruptly. She’d almost said Josh. She’d caught herself just in time. Her cheeks flamed, and she struggled to cover her blunder. “I mean... even if uhmm...”
“Ah-ha! So there is a dream guy after all,” he smirked. “So we should try again. You can pretend I’m that dream guy.”
“That’s okay. I think we’ve made enough of an impact already,” she protested. “Honestly, to be truly believable, if you kiss me again, I’d have to slap you.”