“Does this mean you can’t sign balls today?” As soon as I say it, I know I’m in for it.
Travis turns, slides his sunglasses to the top of his head and looks me up and down. “The only balls I plan to sign . . .” His head jolts forward, and my eyes catch a hand connecting with the back of his skull.
“Saylor asked me to whack you every time you said something inappropriate,” Cooper says, and we all laugh.
“I hadn’t even said it yet.” Travis rubs the back of his head and mutters a string of cuss words.
As soon as the guys landed, they filled me in on everything, which only made me miss my team more than ever. I’m excited to go back but dreading the day I leave Richfield. Each day is getting harder and harder when it comes to Bellamy and Chase. I want to tell her I love her and ask her to move to Boston but am afraid of what she might say. My ma says the only way to know, is if I put myself out there. I countered with, “Sometimes it’s best not to know.” It isn’t, of course, but that’s what I keep telling myself.
The group of us get out of the car. I’m sure to outsiders, the SUV resembles one of those clown cars in the circus. Big guys keep exiting, one by one. All I can say is, thank god for third row seating. And for the BoRe organization. When Ethan and Travis said they were going to come visit for a few days, it was Bellamy who suggested we hold an autograph session. She called it giving back to the community and said it would be fun. Not that I wasn’t already doing so with the Sinclair Fields, but this was a chance to do something fun for the kids. I asked the guys if they were interested, which I knew they would be, but when Travis told me that the others were coming as well, I got a little teary. Then I realized the PR nightmare it could create and called the boss. Mr. Stone assured me the organization was fully behind me. Shock doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt when posters, hats, baseballs, and mini bats showed up at my parents’ place. My father wasn’t impressed but Nolan was. He and Chase got first dibs on whatever they wanted.
As soon as we’re spotted, the line erupts in cheers and chants. Our names are yelled, and it feels like spring training all over again. We walk together toward the entrance of the complex where one of the Boston Renegades security details stands, decked out in BoRe gear. He’s a big dude, buff and looks menacing. He’s not familiar to me, but I pat him on the shoulder as I walk by and he acknowledges me and the other guys. He and a few of his co-workers are here to keep the lines in order and to make sure nothing bad happens.
Inside, Bellamy, her friend Karter, Owen and Javier are putting the finishing touches on the long tables we will sit at. Black tablecloths with the BoRe logo cover the folding tables. There are boxes of felt tipped pens in front of each seat and a security guard standing behind each chair, but it’s the display before the tables that really grabs my attention. The merchandise the BoRe’s sent is set-up and ready for purchase with the money earned today going back into the fields for maintenance and equipment.
“Hey, can I borrow you for a second?” I rest my hand on Bellamy’s hip to get her attention. She turns, smiles and nods. I motion toward the guys who have gathered together not far from where I’m standing. “Where’s Chase?”
“Right there.” She points toward her son, who is sitting on the bleachers with Nolan and Matty.
“Why’s she here?” I ask and quickly realize how my question sounds.
Bellamy shakes her head back and forth slowly. Over the past few weeks, Matty has shown up at Bellamy’s after practice or one of our games. She stays for dinner and Bellamy drives her home at night. Matty doesn’t talk much about what’s going on at home, but I can imagine it isn’t pretty. “You need to do something,” she whispers.
Doing something means asking the question that’s been plaguing me for a while. It’s right up there with telling Bellamy I love her and want her and Chase to come to Boston. All three issues weigh heavily on my mind, and all three need to be resolved.
I whistle and beckon all three of the kids over. I crouch down when they’re in front of us, looking each of them in the eye. Side-by-side, Nolan and Matty have similar features which increases the ache I feel when it comes to her. What if I ask if she’s my daughter and I’m wrong? What does that do to her already fractured home life, which I seem to be contributing to? What if I ask and I’m told she is? I can’t leave her behind, knowing how volatile and unhinged Brett is. Matty looks at me expectantly and I break eye contact with her.
“I’m going to take you over and introduce you to my teammates.” Chase and Matty light up while Nolan remains reserved. He’s been down this road before and isn’t as excited. “They’ll be having dinner with us later, so you don’t need to wait in line for autographs. Same goes for you, Matty. Okay?” All three nod. I stand and place one hand on Chase’s shoulder and the other reaches for his mother’s hand. When we get to the guys, Travis is cracking some obscene joke.
“Kidd, do you ever stop?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “Nope, just ask Saylor.”
“Congratulations, by the way,” I tell him. I wish I had been there when he announced to the team that Saylor’s pregnant. I remember when he told us he was adopting Lucy. After it was said and done, we threw him our own version of a baby shower. “I’d like for you to meet Bellamy.” I look at her when I say her name and when she glances at me, my heart stops for a minute. “This is her son Chase, my ace pitcher, Matty, and you guys know Nolan.”
Everyone shakes hands, animatedly, and the kids gush about the players before them until someone yells, “Hey, what do we have to do to get some attention around here?”
We all turn and look. Saylor and Lucy, Ainsley and the twins, and Daisy with her growing mid-section are coming toward us with a chorus of “Daddy!” being yelled.
“You fucking dog,” I say to Ethan.
“Only our parents and the wives know, and now whoever sees it on social media after this event.”
“Why the secret?” I ask.
“Just want to enjoy her being pregnant before the media starts hounding her.”
“I can understand that.” I can’t, personally, but it makes sense. Ethan made a lot of social media mistakes early in his career, and the press has never let up on him. They’re always waiting for him to screw up again.
Hugs are given and introductions are made. Saylor tells us that Ryan asked that she come and make sure there weren’t any PR issues, plus Lucy wanted to be with Travis. Cooper holds both his children in his arms. I say hi to them. Janie, who they refer to as JC, is shy and buries her face into her dad’s shoulder. Cal, on the other hand, wants to be let down and as soon as Cooper obliges his son, the boy is off and running. I tell the kids that we’ll pay them to keep Cal out of trouble.
Saylor tugs my arm, pulling me over to the side, away from our group. “The girl,” she says, and I pretend to think she’s talking about Bellamy.
“As soon as I saw her, I was smitten. Found her at the top of a ridgeline one morning, trekking through the snow with a skirt on. Best part is, she had no idea who I was. She doesn’t watch baseball and was long gone by the time I got to high school, so she missed all the fanfare of me playing.”
“I’m not talking about your lady friend,” she says pointedly.
“Oh.”