I could see I wasn't doing that good a job of explaining why I was so upset with her. so I promised I would sit down and write more of an explanation later.
As she turned the rowboat. I gazed back at the rock and then thought about what she had told me. What did it all mean? Was this really something Tyler Monahan had done and if it were so, shouldn't Mrs. Westington know about it? She was so proud and appreciative of all he had done with Echo. Here I am, after only three days, telling her something that would destroy it all.
Echo continued to look at me sadly as she rowed. She's so innocent. I thought. Maybe I was coming on too strong. I smiled back at her so she wouldn't feel bad. I told her everything would be all right and I was not angry at her. Her face brightened again. As soon as we reached the dock and stepped out of the rowboat. I indicated we should continue our walk on around the property, but what she had shown me and had told me through her gestures and few words continued to haunt me. Would I dare ask Tyler Monahan about it?
When we came to the motor home, parked off to the side behind the house. I stopped and stared at the bright letters painted on the side: The Amazing Palaver. It spread such a layer of heaviness over my heart. I was actually anxious for it to be taken away. We were waiting for the attorney to tell us how we should deal with it, as well as all of Uncle Palaver's other possessions. All these legal actions had to be woven through the convoluted halls of justice. I imagined I was lost in some file cabinet in some judge's office.
Echo was full of curiosity. She tugged at my arm. Her hands were moving a mile a minute. I laughed at her exuberance. What she really wanted was to go inside the motor home. She had been told about my living in it with Uncle Palaver and traveling about to perform. I was sure she wondered how someone could live in it as he or she would live in a home. I was hesitant, but she was begging. I was reluctant to go in there and stir my own emotions and memories, but I didn't have the heart to refuse her, especially after how I had reacted to what she had done at the pond.
I opened the motor home door and we stepped up and into it. She went immediately to the driver's seat to toy with the steering wheel. She was like any other teenager. I thought, intrigued with the idea of driving, especially something as big as this. She turned the wheel, imagining herself on the highway. Finally, she rose and went into the living room.
I hadn't done anything with the vehicle since we had arrived. Just looking at the things Uncle Palaver had left out before he had died saddened me. Now that I was inside with her. I felt embarrassed about the mess. I started to clean up and soon, she was helping. We washed the glasses and plates and silverware and put it all in the cabinets. Then I showed her where I had slept and she wanted to climb up and try lying on the bunk. It struck her funny and we both laughed. She pretended to be asleep and be comfortable.
Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could just drive off together and live on some magical road that took us only to happy. joyful places? I thought. I'd become Uncle Palaver and she would see the world. How easy it was to dream. Fantasy was catching, infectious, especially in here where I had harbored so many fantasies of my own.
I continued to straighten up the inside of the vehicle, picking up papers, closing up the garbage. For a few moments, it was as if Uncle Palaver was still alive and he and I were back on the road, parked in some lot, preparing for another show. I actually missed that life, as short as it had been. I went into a reverie, recalling some of the places and events, the crowds that had given him such applause. I didn't realize I was crying tither, until the tears dripped off my chin. It snapped me out of it, but when I looked about. Echo wasn't with me. Where was she?
I turned and saw her at the rear of the motor home. She was standing there with her hands over her ears as though someone was screaming. It confused me for a moment until I realized she was standing in Uncle Palaver's doorway and she was looking in at the Destiny doll.
"Echo! Came away from there!" I shouted, but of course she couldn't hear me. I hurried to her and tugged her arm.
Her face was frill of confusion, fear, and astonishment. The doll was so lifelike that I was sure for a few moments at least, she thought she was looking at a real woman naked. She shook her head. Why was she lying in the bed like that? Why hadn't she been covered or dressed? How would I begin to explain?
She didn't wait she turned away and quickly hurried out of the motor home. I gazed in at Destiny. I should have left this door locked. I thought, or thrown something over her. How could I have forgotten? Her glassy eyes seemed to focus on me accusingly. I had left her here, deserted her. She had been so precious to Uncle Palaver and I had left her.
I sigh
ed and closed the door. By the time I stepped out of the motor home. Echo was around the house, hurrying to go back inside, fleeing from what surely had been a most shocking sight. Mrs. Westington is going to be upset with me. I thought. She didn't want me to expose Echo to the doll just yet. She'll surely want me to leave now. Once Tyler Monahan heard about it, he would say. "See. I told you she'd be a bad influence," Mrs. Westington would have no other choice but to ask me to leave.
Resolved to it. I headed back to the house.
Apparently, however. Echo hadn't stopped to tell her grandmother what she had just seen. Instead, she had gone directly up to her room. Mrs.
Westington stepped out of the kitchen when I entered.
"Did you two have a nice walk and go rowing on the pond?" "Yes, Ma'am," I said.
"I know it's terrible that I don't get that child out and about more. Maybe now that you're here, we'll do it. I'll have Trevor take us for a ride this weekend. We'll go to a nice restaurant for lunch and shop. I need some things myself. I have a roast chicken cooking. Hope you have an appetite."
"That's been my problem. I always have an appetite." I said.
"Well thank your lucky stars you do. A good appetite means a healthy soul. Where's Echo?"
"She came in ahead of me. I guess she went on up to her room."
"Oh, did she? Well, maybe she's a little tired. Tyler works her hard and long when he's at it. He just loves that girl. He's determined to bring her up to speed. I'm sure he will. He'll do the same for you." she added.
Maybe. I thought, maybe not. but I smiled and nodded.
"I'll just go and wash up and come down to help you," I said.
"No rush now. I'm fine. I've been feeding people for quite a long time without much help."
She stared at me. It was on the tip of my tongue to confess, to tell her what had just happened. but I didn't do it.
"You look like the cat's got your tongue. Anything wrong?"
My chance to come clean. I thought. but I didn't do it. I didn't want to risk losing her and this home. I shook my head and hurried up the stairs.