None of this happened quickly enough for me.
Time was not my friend, nor was it Mama's friend. I
got so I hated looking at clocks. They always seemed
to have stopped, or it seemed the hands were moving
through glue. Mama resisted going to see a therapist.
She made promises to Brenda over the phone but
never followed through, even when Brenda located
doctors and practically made the appointments herself.
Mama always had some excuse not to go. I thought it
might change when Brenda and Celia returned for the
Christmas holiday, but they could stay only for a few
days, and any doctor we could find was already on
vacation. Brenda's team was remaining on campus and training since they were neck-and-neck for the
league championship already.
Mama had lost more weight by the time they
returned. whereas I had gained back most of what I
had lost. I was eating more out of frustration and
depression. but Brenda thought I was just being weak
and unable to show any discipline. She didn't hide her
disgust, and if it weren't for Celia, she wouldn't have
said anything kind to me the whole weekend. The only highlight of my life was passing my
driver's license test. I had taken the driver's education
course in school, and that helped a great deal. I had no
other real experience. Other student drivers went out
on weekends with their fathers or their mothers. but
Mama was too nervous to do so with me. I was
determined to get something right, however. The
examiner gave me a compliment. He said I was very
careful and mature.
In late February, the big game was held to