“Thank you.”
“But you need to be there tonight.”
“I will be.”
“And looking fucking happy, Nevada. I won’t have him losing face. His position depends on respect and fear.”
“I savvy, Pres.”
Stone grunts. “Clean yourself up. You’ll be the one taking him.”
I want to protest, but I don’t have the energy or a snowball’s chance in hell of winning the argument.
Later that night, I’m dressed to impress in a pair of leather pants, matching corset, and fuck me heels. My makeup is flawless and my smile is big and fake while my heart is aching.
“You okay, babe?” Mimi asks.
“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” I ask.
“Because Wizard isn’t himself, and you both seem to be avoiding one another like the plague.”
I glance around the room and guide her into the hall. “He doesn’t remember us, Mimi. We told him today and he flipped his shit. Said I was a child and he couldn’t understand why he’d bind himself to a child.” My voice quavers. “It’s like I’m back where I started. Only Wizard is my keeper, instead of my father. I can’t handle it.” I look up at the ceiling and keep the tears at bay. “I’m going to leave. Stone is looking for a spot for me in Vegas.”
“Nevada, no.” Mimi grips my arms. “It’s not permanent.”
“Maybe, maybe not. Regardless, it’s too much for me right now. I’m a fucking wreck. If I’m not crying, I’m sick. I can barely get out of bed and face the mess my life has become. My presence agitates him. The period he doesn’t remember is a trigger and that period involves his time with me. It sets him off. I’ve seen it. It’s gotten better, but I can still see him struggling. I can’t be a distraction, or a hindrance to his recovery.”
“So you’re just going to leave?”
I grab her arm and drag her to the end of the hallway. “Look.” I point to Wizard, sitting at the bar beside one of the Club Mama’s. Bunny. She’s tilted into him while smiling, and he’s lapping up. “You tell me you could see Riker be like that with other bitches, right under your nose. Not even giving a shit and knowing to him, you’re nothing!” I hiccup through tears. “Leaving is what’s best for us both. Then, we can go on with our lives.”
“Nevada, I—I’m sorry.”
“I took a chance, this is my fault. I can’t regret it. It’s given me back myself. But I’ll be damned if I’ll do it again.” I grit my teeth.
“Babe, you know old lady is a lifetime commitment.”
“I’m sure he’ll be happy
to forget I exist,” I spit. “I want to hate him. It would be so much easier if I could. But I love him. I love him and I never got a chance to tell him. That’s the worst part.”
Mimi hugs me tight.
I bury my face in her shoulder. “I’m sorry I’m not stronger. I can’t be here and accept scraps while I wait for a miracle. I spent my life existing like that. I won’t go back.”
“It’s okay,” she whispers, stroking my hair. “You don’t have to. Whatever you need, I’m here.”
I cling to my friend’s support. This is the only way to give us both what we need.
It’s like I’ve entered the twilight zone. Nevada is playing the role of old lady with a fake smile and sexy outfit. I might not feel like I’m her old man, but I can admire what she’s put on display with her leather pants and matching corset. There’s a new confidence about her I don’t recall seeing before the accident as she glides across the floor with her kick ass boots. It’s disconcerting thinking of her like this. I feel like a dirty old man, checking out a young cheerleader. Frustrated, I slam back another shot. The fuzzy area of my brain pisses me off. I don’t like not being in complete control and there’s club business I’m not filled in about.
Stone wants to leave it until tomorrow. Which means it’s bad enough to fuck up my homecoming. I see signs of lockdown left and right. I think it has something to do with how I ended up in a coma in the first place.
“You’re supposed to be having a good time, not brooding.”
Her sensual purr makes me smile. I glance up at the busty brunette and raise my glass. “It got a lot better just now, Brownie.”
“Flirt.” She grins. “Seriously though, Wizard. It’s really good to have you back.”