Damon’s arms tightened on Georgia. This was all news to him as well.
Taylor wiped at her face again. “I made Angus stay quiet. There was no point telling you.”
“There was every point.”
“You’d have quit and come home for nothing.”
“I’d have come home for you. You think I care more about my job than you. Jesus. And you’ve punished me ever since.”
“I didn’t punish you, I was letting you go.”
“Where the fuck was I going?” Jamie’s voice was an agonised wheeze.
“Anywhere you wanted not tied to me.”
“Would that have been so bad, you and me?”
“Yes, because I’m a hopeless failure and you’ve made a good life.” Taylor looked at Damon. “All of you have. I’m living off Damon’s charity. I earn more from Angus than my own gigs, and I can’t give singing up though we all know I’m never going to make it.”
“You were pregnant with my baby and you didn’t tell me.” Jamie stood up, hand to his chest again. He was pale, and wore a dangerous expression and he meant to make use of it. “I’m going to fuck Angus up.”
Damon moved. He released Georgia and stepped around her. He put himself in Jamie’s path.
“Out of my way, Damon.” An odd courtesy, given Jamie could’ve moved around Damon with the ease of a shadow, but that was Jamie, thoughtful, careful, even as he must be devastated.
Damon put a hand out. “Don’t leave it like this.”
?
?They chose this—the two of them.”
“Let him go,” said Taylor. “He’s allergic to me. He’s having an asthma attack. He needs a puffer.”
Damon turned towards Taylor. “Angus has always wanted to tell Jamie, hasn’t he? That’s why you and he were prickly with each other. You didn’t trust…” his voice gave out and he coughed, swore, “What did any of us do to make you not trust us?”
Taylor shook her head. She had her arms folded, but her legs apart, knees bent. Her eyes were wild. She was ready to run, ready to make a stand, ready for anything except kindness. Georgia crossed behind Damon and Jamie and planted herself in front of Taylor.
Taylor’s hands came up to push her away, but their eyes met and Taylor’s refilled with tears.
“Let them care,” Georgia said, softly, like you might to a skittish animal. “Don’t push them away. Angus did keep your secret. You’re so close to Damon, I thought you were in love with him until I worked out that you’re in love with Jamie.”
Taylor’s face crumpled and her knees sagged. Georgia stepped forward and touched her shoulder and in stuttered increments, Taylor came into her arms.
It should’ve been Jamie who was holding her while she broke apart, but Georgia looked around and Jamie had gone.
29: Blown
The band was a sonic scream and someone close was smoking weed and if the security had been tighter Damon would never have been allowed to stand so close to the stage. Georgia seemed to think he was in danger. She’d tried to pull him away from the speakers, but he shook her off. She didn’t get the danger had passed? He was blind. He didn’t have a voice reliable enough to record an answering machine message, let alone a commercial or a movie, and when they re-sectioned his vocal cords, he’d have even less.
If she thought he was in genuine danger of blowing his eardrums, all the better.
But of course, she couldn’t see things like he did. She was a good person. And he wouldn’t drag her down into all his mess. He should’ve broken things off with her already. He’d meant to, but he was a coward so he’d acted like an arsehole instead, being sullen and moody, taking risks like using his voice too much and going swimming alone.
And then Taylor dropped her bomb on Jamie and everything got worse. Hearing Taylor fall apart, learning finally what sat inside her sharp edges and knowing if he’d had sight, he’d have worked it out, could’ve done something about it, was too much. And Jamie, God. He’d never guessed at Jamie’s feelings for Taylor. He’d let them all down, before he ever intended to.
And Georgia most of all. She’d been talking to Hamish, at night when she thought Damon wasn’t listening, but he’d never stopped listening to her, never stopped wanting things to be different, even when he turned away from her love. When she talked to Hamish he heard restrained need in her voice. He wasn’t sure what it meant, could be she needed closure, could be her therapist suggested they talk, maybe she still loved the guy. Two months ago, they’d have talked it through, he’d have known the answer to that; now he couldn’t afford to hope it was otherwise.
Tonight there’d be no going back. He’d break it off. Tonight he’d give Georgia what she really needed from him, not what she’d destroy herself over.