I put my beer down and go to her. “Baby, I’d really love it if you’d put your shit down and spend the night with me.” I push her strap back off her shoulder. “I never beg, Wylla Mae, but you got me ready to go down on my knees if that’s what it takes. You’ve fuckin’ ruined me.”
“I should go,” she whispers, but the bag drops to the floor, and I wrap my arms around her. “What am I going to do with you?”
“Be with me.”
“What are you even saying, East?”
Fucking hell. I swore I wouldn’t involve myself in this shit. I swore I would let her go. My heart ignores the warning signal firing inside my head for me to do that very thing. To send her on her damn way, but I love Wylla Mae. Love her so damn much it tears me all up inside. “Move in with me. You can commute.”
“I can’t. Freshman have to live on campus and so do sophomores unless I turn twenty-one, so unless you have a time machine…”
“I’ll get an apartment there.”
“East. Stop. I said I would come on the weekends.”
“You’re right. I’m not thinking clearly.” I shake my head feeling drunk on her. All I can think about is making her mine.
“No, you aren’t, but I love that you’d want me to.”
“Let’s go to bed.” I turn her toward the bed then unbutton her shorts and yank them down her legs. I follow her into the bathroom, and we brush our teeth. After that we settle into bed. I pull her in close throwing a leg over her and tucking her into my chest.
“East…”
“What?’
“What if I did get pregnant? What would we do?”
“We’d fuckin’ be having a baby.” The thought should be enough for me to kick her out of this bed, but it makes me want to hold her closer. My heart seizes. The thought of her belly swollen with my child makes me hard as damn rock. Christ on a cracker I need to put a stop to these emotions, but the harder I fight them the stronger they grow.
“What if I wasn’t ready?”
My heart leaps to my throat. “You saying you’d want an abortion?”
“No. I don’t know. I just think we need to know what we’d both want.”
“What I want and what you need are two different things, Wylla Mae. I’d make you my Old Lady tomorrow if you’d stay, but I know you have college and other plans.” I kiss her forehead. “Get some sleep. Tomorrow you need to go get on birth control.”
Eventually her breathing evens out. It takes me a lot longer to find sleep. All these damn thoughts are running through my mind. Thoughts of claiming her as my Old Lady. Thoughts of her having my child. I already bought a one-way ticket to hell and it seems I’m intent on dragging Wylla Mae there with me.
But fuck me…at least we’ll burn there together.
I’m a sorry bastard.
**
“Long time no see, motherfucker.” Nickel, my VP grins as I take a seat across from him. Been a long time since we’ve had a sit down just the two of us. Bastard is always making some big deal and chasing pussy. Daisy places a beer in front of me and he smacks her on the ass. “Keep’em coming, sweet cheeks.” Brushing his fingers through his salt ‘n pepper streaked hair he slicks it back in a ponytail at the nape of his neck.
“Been busy.” I take a hard pull from my beer.
“You ain’t been busy a day in your life unless you’re holed up with a woman somewhere. What’s her name?”
“None of your concern.”
“Shit.” He grins while rolling us a fat joint. “That serious, man. You afraid I’ll steal her out from under you?”
“She wouldn’t have your sorry ass.”
“Damn. I’m offended. You look…fuck. I don’t know real happy.” His blue eyes go big. “Wylla fuckin’ Mae.”