“Knock. Knock.” I glance to the door of my room and see Ruthie.
My heart jumps to my throat. “Wha-what are you doing here?”
“I meant to come sooner, but I’ve had some car trouble.” She rolls her eyes. “Anyway, the nurse said you were released and asked if I was your ride. Do you need a ride?”
“I couldn’t ask you to do that.”
“It’s no trouble. I figured your mom would be here.”
“We aren’t speaking.”
“Okay. Well I’m here. Do you have a car seat?”
“I do at the apartment.”
“No problem. I will run and get it. You and this little sweetie.” She rubs a finger over my sleeping daughter’s dark hair. “You sit tight, and I’ll be back in a flash.” She starts back out the door of my hospital room.
“Ruthie?”
“Yeah?” her voice wobbles slightly.
“The key. It’s in the front pocket of my bag.”
“Right.” She fishes it out and flashes me a tense smile.
I swallow hard once she’s gone. Does James know she’s here? Did he send her to check on us? Does she know the truth? Did she come to see for herself that I gave birth to her husband’s love child.
I have too many questions and no one to ask them to.
Chapter Twenty-five
“You really didn’t need to go to so much trouble.” My stomach churns as Ruthie busies herself in the kitchen boiling bottles.
“Rochelle would have been glued to your side if she were still here. I don’t know, Alexa. Seeing you. It makes me feel closer to her if that makes sense.” She dabs at her eyes. “Sorry. I get so emotional at times.”
“Don’t apologize. You miss her. I do too.”
“You were like the big sister she always wanted. I want another baby, but James feels it’s too soon after Rochelle.” My heart clenches in my chest hearing his name. She has no clue that my daughter belongs to her husband. I’m a terrible person. She’s grieving the loss of her daughter, and here I am flaunting my baby in her face in the apartment her husband pays for. “Between us, he’s having a rough time. Losing Rochelle changed him, but it brought us closer together. I know you and Ro were friends, but I think being a mom now you can relate.”
“Sure. I’m glad I guess that things have gotten better for you guys. I didn’t know you were having trouble,” I lie.
“Things were rocky but last night.” She winks. “We well reconnected you could say. Before long our babies might be playmates. I think James will come around, and well if we are lucky, we conceived last night. He was just...” she lifts her shoulders and smirks all dreamily.
I’m going to be sick. Bile burns in the back of my throat. He was with her. While I was in the hospital
crying for him, he was fucking his wife. I deserve it. I know I do. But her words and the bitter truth of it all still fucking cuts into my chest and rips my heart out. He was never going to leave her. Not for me. He never loved me, did he? It was all sex.
My head spins as the realization takes root. He used me. I was nothing but the other woman. My heart hammers in my chest so fast. I can’t breathe. Is this what a panic attack feels like? Or am I truly dying?
“To be honest with you, Alexa. Rochelle isn’t the only reason I’m here.”
Sweat beads across my top lip. My stomach plummets to my feet. Oh shit. She knows. She’s going to tell me that James and her want my baby or to stay away. My mind races as she smiles at me.
“My father.”
“I...I’m sorry what about him?”
“I know this might be a difficult conversation to have, but I know what he did to you, and I was wondering...well I got the impression that your daughter might be my half-sister. So if you need anything at all I want you to know that you can count on me. He may have been a bad man, but what he did isn’t your fault. Your mom may not be in the picture, but you’ve got me. James too. I know he’s been cold and distant since the accident, but he knows you need us.”