And once again, despite the night we’d had and intimacy being the last thing that should’ve been on my mind, all I could think about was being with Cian. I couldn’t think of anything more freeing, nothing that would make me feel more alive, than being with the man who was irrevocably mine… the man I loved.
When he went to offer me another piece of fruit, I gently curled my fingers around his thick wrist, smiling as I shook my head. “I’m full. You took care of me completely.” I could see the way his face softened as I said those words and knew that to him, seeing me comfortable and well taken care of by his hand was a pleasure in itself. He was proud about that.
He set the tray that room service had brought over on the bedside table and moved fully back so he was resting against the headboard. And then he opened his arms, urging me without saying a word to come to him.
I eagerly moved across the bed and settled against his side, my hand on the hard, rolling plains of his abdomen, my head resting on a pectoral muscle. He enveloped me with his big, strong arms and buried his nose in my hair. I heard him inhale deeply, and closed my eyes, awareness and something deep and satisfying, warm and loving filling me.
We stayed like that for long moments, the silence a heavy, comfortable balm surrounding me. I felt drowsiness start to claim me, that cloak of sleep taking me away. I fought it, blinking rapidly because I didn’t want this moment to end, where I was wrapped in Cian’s arms and where nothing could touch us.
“I want tae take ye back tae Scotland.” His low but deeply accented voice roused me, and I blinked a few times, adjusting myself so I could tilt my head back and look into his face.
There was a softness in his eyes, and the small smile he gave me, the one that gently curved the corner of his mouth, had my heart fluttering. How could it be possible to feel something so strong for someone so soon after meeting them? I felt like I’d asked myself that so many times since Cian had come into my life.
How did I get so lucky to have a man like him by my side?
“I want tae take ye back there tae ensure yer safety.” The way he looked at me and the tone of his voice told me there was more he had to say. “And then I’m going tae come back here and help Odhran find his mate… just like he came here tae help me find ye.”
I was already shaking my head before he even finished. “We just found each other, reunited. I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want you to leave me.” He cupped my face, and it took everything in me not to close my eyes and just absorb the feeling of him holding me.
“Mo ghràidh, I don’t want tae leave ye. That’s the last thing I want.” His voice was firm, adamant.
I could tell how much he wanted me to trust and understand—to believe those words. I knew how much he needed me to.
“But it’s no’ safe for ye here, and I will no’ put yer life in jeopardy.” He rested his head back on the wall, his eyes focusing on something straight ahead. “No’ having ye by my side, even if I kno’ ye’re safe, even if I kno’ I’m coming back tae ye, it’s like somebody ripping out my heart.” He looked over at me, his head moving slowly. “Dramatic, I kno’, but the truth nonetheless.”
“I’m not leaving your side. I’ll stay here with you. I’ll help you.” The smile he gave me was soft, respectful, as if he was proud I was willing to step up. But I could also see the disapproval on his face, the denial that he would not allow me to do that. “Please,” I whispered. “I don’t want to be left alone. I don't want that for you either. I don’t want to be without you.”
Once again I was struck with the monumental feeling of how true and right those words felt. “I'm not leaving you,” I said again, harder, firmer this time. “You’re mine as I’m yours, so this is my fight too.” I rose slightly and rolled my shoulders back. “I’ll stand by your side to take down the people who are hurting what is now a part of my life.” I stared deeply, sincerely into his eyes, hoping he felt my words. “Odhran protected me with his life, and I’ll fight for him too.”
Cian reached out and smoothed a finger along my cheek, his smile warm and… proud.
“God, how did I survive without ye?”