‘Oh, really?’ There was a hint of surprise in his tone. ‘Why ever not?’
‘Howard doesn’t like the thought of me working fulltime,’ she said, pleased with her response as it was as close to the truth as she could get.
‘And you agreed to that?’
‘I…’ She lifted her chin a fraction. ‘Yes. It frees me to do…other things.’
‘What other things do you like doing?’
Ashleigh knew she had backed herself into a tight corner and the only way out of it was to lie. She averted her gaze once more and inspected a figurine near her with avid intent. ‘I go to the gym.’
‘The gym?’ His tone was nothing short of incredulous.
Her chin went a bit higher as she met his eyes again. ‘What are you saying, Jake? That I look unfit as well as fat?’
He held up his hands in a gesture of surrender. ‘Hey, did I ever say you were fat?’
She threw him a resentful look and folded her arms across her chest. ‘Yesterday when we met you said I’d put on weight. In my book that means you think I’m fat.’
She heard him mutter an expletive under his breath.
‘I think you look fabulous.’ His dark gaze swept over her, stalling a little too long for her comfort on the up-thrust of her breasts. ‘You were a girl before, barely out of your teens. Now you’re a woman. A sexy gorgeous-looking woman.’
Who has given birth to your son, Ashleigh wanted to add, but knew she couldn’t.
Would she ever be able to?
‘Thank you,’ she mumbled grudgingly and looked away. Jake gave an inward sigh.
He’d almost forgotten how sensitive she was. Her feelings had always seemed to him to be lying on the surface of her skin, not buried deep inside and out of reach as his mostly were.
But the Ashleigh he’d known in the past was certainly no gym junkie. Her idea of exercise had never been more than a leisurely walk, stopping every chance she could to smell any flowers that were hanging over the fence. It had driven him nuts at times. He needed the challenge of hard muscle-biting endurance exercise to keep his mind off the pain of things he didn’t want to think about.
He still needed it.
‘I’m prepared to negotiate on the hours you work,’ he inserted into the silence.
Her head came up and he saw the relief in her blue eyes as they met his. ‘Is…is ten to four all right?’ she asked.
He pretended to think about it for a moment.
She shifted uncomfortably under his scrutiny and he wondered why she felt so ill at ease in his company. He’d expected a bit of residual anger, maybe even a good portion of bitterness, but not this outright nervousness. She was like a rabbit cornered in a yard full of ready-to-race greyhounds, her eyes skittering away from his, her small hands fluttering from time to time as if she didn’t quite know what to do with them.
‘Ten to four will be fine,’ he said. ‘Do you want me to pick you up each day?’
‘No!’
One of his brows went upwards at her vehement response.
Ashleigh lowered her eyes and looked down at the twisting knot of her hands. ‘I—I mean that won’t be necessary. Besides—’ she gave him a little speaking glance ‘—Howard wouldn’t like that.’
‘And what Howard wouldn’t like good little Ashleigh wouldn’t dream of doing, right?’ he asked without bothering to disguise the full measure of scorn in his tone.
She clamped her lips shut, refusing to dignify his question with an answer.
‘For Christ’s sake, Ashleigh,’ he said roughly. ‘Can’t you see he’s all wrong for you?’
‘Wrong?’ She glared at him in sudden anger. ‘How can you say that? It was you who was so wrong for me!’
‘I wasn’t wrong for you; I just—’
‘You were wrong for me!’ She threw the words at him heatedly. ‘You ruined my life! You crushed my confidence and berated everything I held as important. I was your stupid plaything, something to pass the time with.’
‘That’s not true.’ His voice was stripped of all emotion.
Ashleigh shut her eyes for a moment to hold back the threatening tears. She drew in a ragged breath and, opening her eyes again, sent him a glittering look. ‘God damn you, Jake. How can you stand there and say Howard is all wrong for me when at least I can be myself with him? I could never be myself with you. You would never allow it.’
Jake found it hard to hold her accusing glare, his gut clenching at the vitriol in her words. As much as he hated admitting it, she was very probably right. He wasn’t proud of how he had treated her in the past. He’d been insensitive and too overly protective of his own interests to take the time to truly consider hers.