No one said anything. This next part was going to be the hardest to say aloud. “That’s why . . . why Bernadette couldn’t get out that night. We had taken something—I’m not sure what—and she was too far gone. That’s why she died. Why I should have died, too.”
I closed my eyes and waited. Waited for the recrimination I so deserved, that I had been dreading for a year.
But it never came. Instead, I felt a heavy hand fall on my shoulder, and jolted with surprise. When I opened my eyes, Lester was in front of me, grinning and waving a pocketknife in front of me. “Looks like they didn’t check our pockets before they dumped us. Took me a little while, but I was able to reach this eventually.”
“You—” I looked around as Lester busied himself sawing through the rope that bound my hands. “Aren’t you guys going to say anything?”
“Are you still using?” Saul asked softly.
I shook my head vehemently. “No,” I said. “I quit when Bernadette died. I’ve been clean for a year now, I swear to you.”
“We believe you,” Darren said.
“Can we have this heart-to-heart later?” Lester asked as he finished severing the rope around my ankles. “In case you’ve all forgotten, we have a bit of a situation here.”
Finally free, I set to untying the ropes that bound Saul, who was closest to me. Before too long, we were all free, stretching and rubbing at the rope burns that chafed our wrists.
“Shh,” Chris cautioned. He cocked his head, listening intently. “I think they’re coming back.” He motioned to Lester, and the two of them quietly took up positions on either side of the front door.
The door creaked open, revealing Cole and Heath. “Time to get going, boys,” Cole called. “Valentina is expecting you.”
Both of them stopped short as they caught sight of us, standing, unbound. “Oh shit,” Heath had just enough time to say, before Lester stepped forward and landed a punch square in his face. The crunch of Heath’s nose breaking was loud and sickening, and I knew I would hear it in my nightmares for years to come. Provided, of course, that we managed to get out of here alive.
Lester and Chris worked together seamlessly. They didn’t even have to speak aloud; it seemed they could communicate with a single glance. Together, they made short work of Cole and Heath, until both goons slumped, unconscious, to the floor.
Chris looked up at us, face flushed and sweaty. “Can someone toss us some of that rope?” he asked. “I don’t want them coming after us before we’ve had enough time to put some proper distance between us.”
We left the two men bound on the floor of the warehouse, blinking in the sudden bright light of day. I cursed. When Cole and Health had caught up to us, it had been the middle of the night. There was no telling how much time we’d lost when we were unconscious, or how much farther away Ella was now. To my surprise, our van was parked in front of the warehouse, a little dinged up, but none the worse for wear. I guessed that Cole and Heath had realized that they couldn’t fit all seven of us in the sedan they’d used to run us off the road, and brought it here to transport us back to the Ball. That was probably what they’d been doing when we came to.
We piled into the van, Saul taking the driver’s seat. The keys were still in the ignition. “Okay,” Saul said, adjusting the seat to fit his tall frame. “Where to now?”
All eyes turned to me. I shifted uncomfortably under their stares. “Whatever you all think is best,” I mumbled. “I think I’ve given up the right to make decisions for anyone else.”
Jason’s hand fell on my shoulder. “Look,” he said, “you went through something incredibly difficult, all on your own, when you didn’t have to.” He looked around at the others, who nodded. “If you’d told any of us that you were struggling, we would have been there for you.”
“I know that now,” I said. I couldn’t meet his eyes. “But I . . . couldn’t. I was too ashamed.”
“Look at me,” Jason said firmly. More firmly than I had ever heard shy, sensitive Jason speak. “What happened to Bernadette was not your fault. You have to understand that, or you’re never going to be able to move on from this. Even if you were high. It was an accident, and you two happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. You’re going to have to forgive yourself for that.”
I swallowed hard. Maybe he was right. I had been carrying this weight on my own for a long time. At the very least, it felt good to finally share the load.