It takes them two more hours before they are finished. When Sofia comes in, I send her to the shower right away. I make more food than I should, and I’m somewhat hoping that Reed is going to come back so we can talk.
Sofia falls asleep practically at the table in her plate. I carry her to bed and think about if I should call him or not. I pace for a good ten minutes before calling. He answers right away, and I can tell that he was sleeping.
"I’m so sorry. Were you sleeping?" I ask, and I can hear the sheets rustling from his side.
"Shit," he says. “I wanted to come over to see Sofia."
"She fell asleep at the table. I’ll let you go,” I say. “We’ll talk tomorrow."
"What did you make for dinner?" he asks, and I laugh.
"What difference does it make?" I sit on the couch, wondering where he’s staying. Is he staying with his parents?
"So I know if I should eat before I come over." He laughs, and I can hear him walking.
"Sofia is in bed," I remind him.
"Yeah," he says, his voice soft. “I was wondering if we could talk." My stomach flips. “Go over a couple of things."
"Yeah," I say, my leg moving now. “We should talk about how things are going to go."
"Be there in ten," he says and disconnects. I get up now and make him a plate. I’m sure that he’s hungry. I look at the phone in my hand, seeing the screen saver of Sofia and Pops staring back at me.
The nerves fill me now, and I have the sudden need to vomit. I put a hand to my stomach and walk to the kitchen, hanging my head. "It’s going to be fine," I tell myself. “What is the worst that can happen?" I’m not helping anything at this point as my palms get sweaty.
I don’t even have any time to talk myself out of it because I hear his truck arriving. I look at the door, waiting for the knock. It’s going to be fine. Everything is going to be okay, and when I open it, I see him standing there, wearing dark blue jeans and a green shirt. His hair has been pushed back with his hands. I’m suddenly back to six years ago. The flutter in my stomach starts, and my heart speeds up. He always had this effect on me. "Hey," I say, stepping out of the way so he can come in. Everything is not fine. I should not be so attracted to him. It’s been six years, six.
"Hey." He smiles, stepping in and coming straight to me, standing in front of me. I hold my breath as he comes closer and closer to me. His hand goes to my hip, and he leans in and kisses my cheek. “You look nice,” he says, letting go of my hip. I’m wearing the same thing I was wearing this morning.
"You smell nice,” I say and then close my eyes and wait for the floor to open up and swallow me whole.
"A shower will do that to you." He laughs, and I walk to the kitchen. “Smells amazing."
"I made meatloaf and mashed potatoes,” I say, “with corn on the cob." I walk to the stove and pick up the plate. “Not sure if you stopped to eat or not." I grab a fork and knife and walk over to the table. "So I made you a plate."
He claps his hands together and sits down while I turn to grab him something to drink. “Did you eat?" he asks, and I nod.
"Yeah, we ate,” I say and sit down in front of him.
"This is good,” he says, eating, and I look at him.
"I was thinking," I start to say. “That we should go over a couple of things."
"I was thinking the same,” he says between bites. “Sort of a can- and can’t-do list."
"Yes." I nod at him. “If we are going to do this."
He looks up at me and smirks that fucking smirk I hate but love. “What are we going to do?" He puts down his fork. “I have a couple of things I’d like to do."
"What are you talking about?" I ask, confused. “I was talking about us co-parenting." He nods at me and continues eating his food. "Like I was saying, if we’re going to do this, we need to have rules."
"I agree,” he says.
"Routine," I start. “It’s important that she stick to her routine." I swallow. “If she is at my house or at yours." The thought of her not being with me at night hits me, and I stop talking.
"Are you okay?" He looks up with concern on his face.
"Yeah," I say, blinking the tears away. “It’s just she’s always been with me, and now I’m going to have to …" Turning now, I get up to get myself some water. I feel him behind me as he puts his hands on my arms, his touch searing into my skin.