He suddenly pulled back and stared at her. A smile touched the corners of his lips. “I could keep going and going, but before we go any further we need to talk, determine what brought us to this point so it won’t ever be allowed to happen again. I don’t want us to ever let anything or anyone have power, more control over the vows we made three years ago.”
Sienna nodded, thinking the way the firelight was dancing over his dark skin was sending an erotic frisson up her spine. “All right.”
He stood. “I’ll be right back.”
Sienna lifted a brow, wondering where he was going and watched as he crossed the room to open the desk drawer. Like her, he had changed into a T-shirt and a pair of sweats, and as she watched him she found it difficult to breathe. He moved in such a manly way, each movement a display of fine muscles and limbs and how they worked together in graceful coordination, perfect precision. Watching him only knocked her hormones out of whack.
He returned moments later with pens and paper in hand. There was a serious expression on his face when he handed her a sheet of paper and a pen and kept the same for himself. “I want us to write down all the things we feel went wrong with our marriage, being honest to include everything. And then we’ll discuss them.”
She looked down at the pen and paper and then back at him. “You want me to write them down?”
“Yes, and I’ll do the same.”
Sienna nodded and watched as he began writing on his paper, wondering what he was jotting down. She leaned back and sighed, wondering if she could air their dirty laundry on paper, but it seemed he had no such qualms. Most couples sought the helpful guidance of marriage counselors when they found themselves in similar situations, but she hadn’t given them that chance. But at this point, she would do anything to save her marriage.
So she began writing, being honest with herself and with him.
Chapter Sixteen
Dane finished writing and glanced over at Sienna. She was still at it and had a serious expression on her features. He studied the contours of her face and his gaze dropped to her neck, and he noticed the thin gold chain. She was still wearing the heart pennant he’d given her as a wedding gift.
Deep down, Dane believed this little assignment was what they needed as the first step in repairing what had gone wrong in their marriage. Having things written down would make it easier to stay focused and not go off on a tangent. And it made one less likely to give in to the power of the mind, the wills and emotions. He wanted them to concentrate on those destructive elements and forces that had eroded away at what should have been a strong relationship.
She glanced up and met his gaze as she put the pen aside. She gave him a wry smile. “Okay, that’s it.”
He reached out and took her hand in his, tightening his hold on it when he saw a look of uncertainty on her face. “All right, what do you have?”
She gave him a sheepish grimace. “How about you going first.”
He gently squeezed her hand. “How about if we go together? I’ll start off and then we’ll alternate.”
She nodded. “What if we have the same ones?”
“That will be okay. We’ll talk about all of them.” He picked up his piece of paper.
“First on my list is communication.”
Sienna smiled ruefully. “It’s first on mine, too. And I agree that we need to talk more, without arguing, not that you argued. I think you would hold stuff in when I made you upset instead of getting it out and speaking your mind.”
Dane stared at her for a moment, then a smile touched his lips. “You’re right, you know. I always had to plug in the last word and I did it because I knew it would piss you off,”
“Well, stop doing it.”
He grinned. “Okay. The next time I’ll hang around for us to talk through things. But then you’re going to have to make sure that you’re available when we need to talk. You can’t let anything, not even your job, get in the way of us communicating.”
“Okay, I agree.”
“Now what’s next on your list?” he asked.
She looked up at him and smiled. “Patience. I know you said that I don’t have patience, but neither do you. But you used to.”
Dane shook his head. “Yeah, I lost my patience when you did. I thought to myself, why should I be patient with you when you weren’t doing the same with me? Sometimes I think you thought I enjoyed knowing you had a bad day or didn’t make a sale, and that wasn’t it at all. At some point what was suddenly important to you wasn’t important to me, anymore.”
“And because of it, we both became detached,” Sienna said softly.