He couldn’t read her expression, and that made him uneasy. “It was my fault. I guess I started having flashbacks to my disastrous marriage with Colleen. We were a couple of workaholics who had no clue how to compromise. We were too young, too inflexible and too poorly suited to make it work out anyway. But it wasn’t just career conflicts that broke us up—hell, we should never have gotten married in the first place. One failed attempt with the wrong woman doesn’t mean I can’t ever have a successful relationship with the right one, even as a single dad, as long as I keep Alice’s welfare a top priority.”
“The last thing I would ever want is for Alice to be hurt.”
“You would never hurt Alice.” That was one statement he could make with total certainty.
“No. I wouldn’t.”
“So, there’s really no reason you and I can’t keep seeing each other after she gets home. I mean, I know it will be even trickier to coordinate our schedules when we add her calendar, but—”
“There is one reason.”
He hesitated, not sure he wanted to ask, but knowing he had to. “What?”
“I don’t date men with children.”
He blinked. “Uh—what?”
She grimaced in what might have been apology. “It’s been a rule of mine for a long time. I sort of broke that rule when I went to the charity thing with you and I’ve broken it with you a few times since. While Alice was away, it was sort of a nonissue, but now that she’s coming home—well, like I said. I don’t date men with children.”
“But these past few weeks…”
“I thought we were just having fun. Filling time.”
“Filling time.” He didn’t like the way the words felt on his tongue.
“We can still be friends, of course.”
He narrowed his eyes at her. “Let’s avoid the clichés, shall we? I thought you liked Alice.”
“I’m very fond of Alice. I think she’s a great kid.”
“But you won’t go out with me because of her.”
“I think that’s for the best.”
Her hands were clenched in front of her, her knuckles white. Had he not seen those signs, he would have thought she was perfectly at ease judging from her tone when she said, “You were right to pull back when you did, Seth. Now that Alice is coming home there’s no pla
ce for me in your life now except perhaps as a friend. I understand that, and I agree.”
“I don’t agree,” he insisted. “We’ve got a good thing going between us, Meagan. You and Alice already get along great. I know it won’t be easy, considering everything, but…”
She was already shaking her head. “I’m sorry. This is just a bad time for me. I’m still catching up from my time off, my family’s going through a difficult time and a new rotation will start soon with new residents and med students for me to teach. Summer brings vacations, which means extra work and call for everyone. There’s just no time left for anything else.”
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the past thirteen years, it’s that it’s possible to make time for the things that are truly important to you,” he said quietly. “Your work is important—so is mine, for that matter—but there is more to life than work.”
“If it were just the two of us, I would probably risk it,” she admitted, her hands still clenched in front of her. “If we tried and failed to make it work between us—because of our schedules, or whatever other obstacle might crop up—one or both of us might get hurt. I could deal with that. But I won’t risk hurting Alice.”
Her adamancy was beginning to shake his own optimism. Was he letting the pleasures of the past three weeks cloud his judgment about his daughter?
Alice was already paying the price of having a mother who was obsessed with her career. And no matter how hard he tried to prevent it, there were still times his own job interfered with things Alice wanted to do. Was it really fair to bring another workaholic into her life?
He still thought it was possible to make this work—though it would take an extraordinary amount of effort on everyone’s part. If either of them wasn’t willing to make that effort—whether for fear of hurting Alice or just due to doubt that it was all worth the trouble—they had no chance of success. That was the ultimate lesson he had learned from his failed marriage. And Meagan was making it pretty clear she wasn’t that strongly invested.
“Maybe—” He sighed, pushing a hand through his drying hair. “Maybe I’d just better go. Sorry about the tea.”
She glanced at the now-cooling mugs without interest.
He moved toward the doorway. Meagan remained where she stood.