The bar and grill was popular with the firefighting crowd, an older building near downtown with a worn sign, large covered patio and music spilling out into the parking lot. Kelley, Garrick and a bunch of others had pushed several tables together on the patio. Jacob was penned into the far corner, surrounded by friends, no chance of Linc getting a word with him, so he didn’t try.
Instead, he sent a fast text. Don’t leave without your present. It was direct without being too flirtatious, but he was nevertheless gratified when Jacob checked his phone, smiled and nodded. That smile was worth all the risk, as was getting to watch him from a distance. He’d always known that Jacob was popular and well-liked, but watching him with his friends like this was different somehow. He had a natural way of putting people at ease, making those around him laugh and have a good time. Pride coursed through Linc, like when Jacob had passed training, chest light, mouth unable to keep back a smile, body almost gloating that he alone would get Jacob by himself later.
“See? This isn’t too hard.” Ray stuck a soda in Linc’s hand.
It took Linc a second to figure out that he didn’t mean the watching-Jacob thing, but rather this, being out, being social. The Wyatt-not-here thing.
“Yeah,” he agreed, even though now that Ray had said it, Wyatt’s shadow loomed over the patio. There by the door to the main building was his favorite summer table. That beer Jacob was drinking was his favorite brand. The song filtering in was one he’d sung along to off-key.
“I know it’s difficult, losing your best friend,” Ray was continuing. “But he wouldn’t want you holed up at your house months on end. Alone. Too serious, even at work. He’d want the old you back. We’ve been worried about you.”
Ray undoubtedly had a point, but all Linc’s brain latched onto was Wyatt wouldn’t want... Hell. What Wyatt wouldn’t want was Linc standing here watching his baby brother with hungry eyes, knowing full well his plans for later. Every kiss was a betrayal of what Wyatt would want. And hell if Linc could stop now. He was in too deep, wanted too much. He might have made his peace with breaking his promise, but still he couldn’t deny the hurt, the way it sliced deep, knowing Wyatt would never forgive him.
Further, the guilt wasn’t only for Wyatt. Here Ray was worried for him when the truth was that Linc wasn’t alone, hadn’t been truly alone for weeks now. Words rose up in his throat only to die as another work friend came over to say hello to Ray. Oh, well. It wasn’t like he would have told him anyway. Would he? For the first time he’d been tempted, his long list of reasons momentarily retreating before it slammed back into him full force.
This is only temporary, he reminded himself as he watched Jacob continue to hold court over at his table. But it was getting harder to believe that, especially when Jacob’s hold on him only seemed to increase. All those reasons, all the guilt over Wyatt weren’t enough to keep him away, keep him from counting down until they’d be alone, and he could show Jacob his birthday surprise.
* * *
“So? Where’s my present?” Finally, heart hammering way more than it should have, Jacob freed himself from his various work friends and made his way to Linc, who was picking at a basket of sweet potato fries. Alone, because Ray and some others had left a while ago, and he hadn’t left this spot. Still Jacob had felt his presence, felt his eyes on him, a mountain lion stalking his prey without moving an inch.
“Depends. How buzzed are you?” Linc kept his voice low as he studied Jacob, making him have to fight the urge to squirm. Instead he grabbed one of the empty seats at Linc’s table, helped himself to a fry.
“Not that much,” he hedged. He wanted in on whatever Linc had planned, but he couldn’t deny being a little tipsy—his beer had been refilled by helpful people and Kelley had insisted on a birthday shot. “I walked over if you’re worried about me driving.”
The bar was only a few blocks from his RV park, and he hadn’t wanted to bother with finding a parking spot. Plus, if he was honest, he’d been hoping for a ride home, another chance to have Linc’s big body filling his little trailer.
“Hmm.” Linc’s mouth twisted. “Guess you shouldn’t have to walk.”
“Nope.” Stealing another fry, he grinned over at Linc. “Don’t worry. I’ll put it around that you did me a favor, nothing more.”
“Luckily, I’m not planning on parking at your place.”
“You’re not?” Jacob hated how disappointment hit him like a dart, deflating all the fun out of the evening.