“I’ve...” Linc started to protest, then paused. He honestly wasn’t sure. Some double dates with Wyatt back in his twenties, painful setups with fresh-faced girls who deserved better. But on his own? It had been a while. “If we’re defining date as sharing a meal at a restaurant knowing sex is probably on the table after, then yeah, I’ve had a few of those. Probably fewer than you and not as much around here, but when I was bumping around from crew to crew, it wasn’t an unheard-of situation.”
“Well, I’m a sure thing for later, and you know it. And we’re sharing a meal out. So...”
Linc groaned because Jacob had him. “Fine. It’s a date. Happy?”
“Ecstatic.” Jacob sounded exactly the opposite.
“And I’m not a total country bumpkin over here. I know the sort of inclusive places you mean, and shocker, I actually know people who eat there. I’m not expecting us to stay anonymous no matter where we eat.”
“You’re not?”
“No. I’m not ashamed to be seen with you or something. Guys at work heard us make plans to go out to eat after getting the parts. It’s not a big deal.” Maybe if he said that enough, he might believe it. “Pick a place you like with red meat on the menu and decent portions, and I’m fine.”
“Good.” Jacob’s tone was far more pleased now. “You know, I’ve always been curious why you don’t just come out. Wyatt’s homophobic high school squad notwithstanding, you mainly have open-minded friends, some of whom already know. You’re not cringing at the idea of strangers maybe thinking you’re on a date. You’ve had same-sex encounters prior to this...”
Hills rolling by, Linc let a few more miles tick away before he answered. “You’re way more into labels than me. I don’t see it as being closeted, not anymore. My dad...he was a bastard.”
“I know.” Jacob sounded all willing to be his champion again, making warmth bloom in Linc’s chest.
“Anyway, he made Wyatt and his crowd look downright tolerant. I didn’t want any part of him knowing, not when I was still bailing out his messes. But now...it’s complicated. And I’m not sure it would make any difference. Not like I’ve got someone at home.”
“True. Not like you’re in a relationship where it might matter.” With a wounded sigh, Jacob slumped in the seat.
Linc hadn’t meant to hurt Jacob, and a heaviness settled over his shoulders. Not wanting to make it worse, he let Jacob stew as they started to approach more clumps of houses on the outskirts of Bend.
Finally, he couldn’t stand the weighted silence anymore. “Out or not, it doesn’t change things between us.”
“I get that, thanks.”
“Fuck.” Linc was mucking it up, exactly as he’d feared. “Listen, even if I was staying, even if we didn’t work together, it would still be...”
“Complicated. Your favorite word. Yeah. I know. Because you want to be noble or some such shit. And you made some promise to Wyatt a million years ago for God knows what reason.”
Linc’s fists tightened on the steering wheel. “It’s not just the promise. Arguing over you almost tanked twenty plus years of friendship. He accused me of ‘turning’ you. More than once. If we were...a thing, a public thing, he wouldn’t be the only one to think like that. I’m older. Too much older. People—your family—might start to wonder...”
That earned him an actual eye roll as he pulled into the store parking lot, Jacob huffing like he was running a hill. “And they’d be beyond stupid. Ten years is nothing. I’ve got a friend in Vegas with a leather Daddy more than twenty years older than him, and they are stupid in love.”
“Good for them.” Linc’s jaw ached from clenching his teeth. He parked the truck but made no move to get out. “And say what you want about your family—I think you’re wrong—but the fact remains that Wyatt saved my life. Maybe I didn’t keep my word to him, and that’s on me, but I still owe it to him and all the rest of them to do right by you. Keep you safe.”
He didn’t simply mean safe at work either. Safe from saddling himself with someone like Linc long-term, a guy who was too much older despite Jacob’s protests otherwise, who couldn’t manage to keep a promise to his best friend, a guy who had itchy feet, needing to outrun his past. And yeah, carrying on like this, it wasn’t necessarily the smartest way to meet that goal, and it continued to weigh heavily on him, knowing he was risking a lot for both of them.
“Fuck.” Jacob let out a tortured sound, head thumping back against the seat. “This isn’t how I wanted tonight to go. Because I get it—you’re leaving, we work together now, and you’ve got your own reasons, even if I don’t like them. I don’t want to fight.”