“Why did you contact me?” she asked, all trace of anger gone.
He took a moment before answering. “I saw a photo of you online. You were with your polo boyfriend. Two young women were pouring champagne over his head and you were in the background. You were smiling but I knew you weren’t happy.”
“You felt sorry for me?”
“I thought that maybe it was time that you’d give me a chance.”
Chelsea sighed. “Are you saying you were hoping I was ready to get married, have a couple of kids, and stay home to wait for you to return? Would I be one of those wives who makes sure you packed clean socks when you fly off to Antwerp?”
“I didn’t think that far ahead.”
“Eli,” Chelsea said, “I’m not like that. Do you know the truth of why I stopped writing you?”
“No,” he said and the word caught in his throat. That had been a long time ago, but the pain was still there.
“Right after my dad said we were going to leave the state, leave you, I thought my heart would break. But then one day I showed up at your house unexpectedly. Your mom let me in and said you were in the nursery. I saw you there holding the new baby and Frank was leaning over both of you. There was such love and . . . I don’t know what—contentment, maybe—in that room that it scared me. I left without telling you I’d been there.”
She looked at Eli. “I’m not like your mom. Miranda never wanted more than a family and a home. All of you are her whole life. But that’s not me.”
“So what do you want?” Eli asked.
Chelsea let her head fall back against the seat. His tone was saying that he’d try to give her whatever it was that she wanted. But she knew enough about life to know that wouldn’t work. “I don’t know,” she said at last. “I’m still trying to figure that out.”
“More race-car drivers?” There was no anger in his voice, just a deep desire to know.
She gave a little laugh. “I’m not sure that what the man does matters. It’s taken me a long time to learn that. Would it make any sense to say that I’ll know it when I find it?”
“I guess so.”
When she looked at him, she saw the sadness in his eyes. “What if I said that if you’d quit your government job, I’d agree to spend my life with you? We could see the world. Would you do it?”
“No,” Eli said, “because then you might be happy but I’d be miserable. It wouldn’t work.”
“I like your honesty.” She reached through to the backseat. “Does your laptop have an internet connection even on the road?”
“Of course.”
“You have some special hookup that the rest of us don’t have?”
When he glanced at her, the sadness was gone from his eyes. “I do. It’s from Japan and it’s going to make a fortune. Planning to find Grace and Abby?”
“Yes.” She started tapping keys. “Eli, just so you know, I may not be in this for the picket fence and family dinner on Sunday, but sex is fine with me.”
“Nice to hear,” he said, but he made no further comment.
When they got back to Edilean, it was growing dark and Eli drove past the house. He parked some distance away, under some trees.
“Why aren’t you using your driveway?” Chelsea asked.
“I want you to stay here in the car and wait for me.”
To Chelsea’s astonishment, he leaned across her, opened the glove box, pressed a button, and a little tray fell down. There was a pistol attached to it. Eli took the firearm and tucked it into the waistband of his jeans.
“Someone’s in the house,” he said.
“You think it might be something to do with Orin the thief?” When she looked at the house, she saw no evidence that anyone was inside. All the windows were dark.
“I have no idea, but I’m not taking any chances.” He got out of the car, then leaned back to her. “If I flick the lights three times, then it’s safe to come in.” He closed the car door soundlessly and slipped away through the trees and shrubs.